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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 27. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Phillipa on February 12, 2009, at 12:19:14
Seriously afraid to go upstairs, talk on phone, be close to family, take a bath showers okay, go places alone. Getting old and dying. Anyone have any thoughts. As the last therapists kept asking what I was afraid of and I said " If I knew I wouldn't be here". And she never helped me figure it out. I know when met husband he didn't want me to shower and keep water running as it was wasteful so the bathtub became a no no. Stupid thread I know. Love Phillipa
Posted by sassyfrancesca on February 12, 2009, at 13:42:25
In reply to What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e, posted by Phillipa on February 12, 2009, at 12:19:14
(((Philippa)): No, not stupid thread. Have you talked to another therapist about this? Of course, fears always have a reason; can be in the subconsious...but a good therapist should be able to help with that.
Hugs, Sassy
Posted by rskontos on February 12, 2009, at 16:28:06
In reply to What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e, posted by Phillipa on February 12, 2009, at 12:19:14
Phillipa,
Are you kidding me, I am having panic attacks going to the grocery store. The grocery store. What is scary at the grocery store. Well beside the bill these days.
I understand, fear has not rhyme or reason.
I second Sassy, a good therapist will help not hinder.
rsk
Posted by Phillipa on February 12, 2009, at 19:58:06
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everythi » Phillipa, posted by rskontos on February 12, 2009, at 16:28:06
Guys I'm serious I can't find one what's the matter with therapists in Charlotte NC. Four so far? I can't afford out of pocket for interviewing. Last time tried a new one after the one was seeing she said she couldn't help me as didn't know a thing about medical conditions. How to search on internet for one any ideas? A desperate woman here who isn't getting any younger. Help!!!! Please!!!! Love Phillipa and thanks for validating me that I'm not some wacked out wierdo.
Posted by Dinah on February 12, 2009, at 20:18:00
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everythi, posted by Phillipa on February 12, 2009, at 19:58:06
Well, I think you've been to see mostly CBT therapists. They probably concentrate on what is going through your mind at the moment and on behavioral changes. Especially if you haven't seen them for a long time, that may be what they focus on.
There's only one way I know to go about finding a new therapist. Interview, interview, interview. You can ask your doctors for recommendations. Some have therapists they like to work with. I found my therapist through a seminar he gave on anxiety. I chose him basically because he was the only person I had spoken to who really seemed interested in being my therapist. And last time I went through the telephone book and my insurance list.
I understand coverage is a problem for you. So your questions to them would include questions about payments they take.
If you have a university in your area, there are sometimes therapists in training who will see you for less money. They'll get supervision and they'll have lots of enthusiasm that might offset their inexperience. The downside is that they won't be able to see you for an extended length of time.
When you talk to potential therapists on the phone, you can see whether they seem like someone you can work with. If they aren't don't worry. I've been through any number of auxiliary and replacement therapist that I didn't care for. It's like dating. The more frogs you kiss, the more likely you are to find your prince(ss) therapist. The prince(ss) won't find you though. You need to go out and hunt them down.
:)
Posted by Phillipa on February 12, 2009, at 20:32:05
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everythi » Phillipa, posted by Dinah on February 12, 2009, at 20:18:00
Dinah you missed one of the fears phone phobia what to do about that? Love Phillipa
Posted by Dinah on February 12, 2009, at 21:48:30
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everythi » Dinah, posted by Phillipa on February 12, 2009, at 20:32:05
Well, that's a tough one. You could stick with the ones that have email or websites or register with one of those services.
Or have someone call for you if there's anyone willing to do that.
But they can't find you, so you need to reach out to them somehow if you want one.
Posted by Dinah on February 12, 2009, at 22:08:21
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everythi » Phillipa, posted by Dinah on February 12, 2009, at 21:48:30
Although....
I think there may be an argument for the thought that the discomfort you're feeling with how your life is now needs to be greater than the discomfort involved in trying to change how things are now.
Posted by Phillipa on February 13, 2009, at 1:00:24
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everythi, posted by Dinah on February 12, 2009, at 22:08:21
Oh there has to be changes. Some days good others bad. If talk to kids grown on phone it actually traumatizes me and leaves me scared. Love Jan got the check the websites again. Thanks Dinah.
Posted by Sharon7 on February 13, 2009, at 6:59:18
In reply to What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e, posted by Phillipa on February 12, 2009, at 12:19:14
Good morning, Phillipa,
Not a stupid thread at all! Our feelings are not stupid. I know they seem that way to us often because we are so critical of ourselves.
I have fears of several things, too, but I think they are pretty much just stuff most people do worry about, like death, disease, your therapist rejecting you.. lol! Sorry.. I know it's not funny, but to put my therapist rejection right up there in the top 3 fears with death and disease show that I fear that way too much, and for no reason probably.
Anyway, I obviously don't know your history since I'm new, but are you in therapy now? You mentioned your 'last' therapist. Does that mean you are not in therapy now? Seeing a pdoc? (Sorry, just don't want to assume any of this.) This sounds like something a good therapist and/or pdoc should help you with, if you are not already getting that help. (o:
I'm sure there are very good reasons why you fear things like taking a bath or going upstairs. The talk of baths wasting water could be a factor in the bath fear, but I wouldn't think the response to that would be "fear," necessarily, unless there was some threat associated with it. Just my opinion. The other fears you mentioned made a lot more sense to me because I have a great deal of trouble interacting with people, family included.
Well, I gotta get to work. I hope you are feeling better today. I'll be anxious to hear how you are doing.
Sharon
Posted by SLS on February 13, 2009, at 7:26:49
In reply to What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e, posted by Phillipa on February 12, 2009, at 12:19:14
> Seriously afraid to go upstairs, talk on phone, be close to family, take a bath showers okay, go places alone. Getting old and dying. Anyone have any thoughts. As the last therapists kept asking what I was afraid of and I said " If I knew I wouldn't be here". And she never helped me figure it out. I know when met husband he didn't want me to shower and keep water running as it was wasteful so the bathtub became a no no. Stupid thread I know. Love Phillipa
I could be wrong about everything, but...
I'm sure you know my take on your situation. I think you have GAD and perhaps a touch of OCD. These appear to be biological illnesses that need biological interventions. However, there seems to be a lot of specific content to your fears. I agree that you might profit from psychotherapy to address this content. However, until your GAD is adequately under control, you will need to work hard to separate out the GAD from the content of your thoughts and feelings. Don't expect psychotherapy to take away your background generalized anxiety. However, I can foresee that you would be able to mitigate the specific fears themselves.
Another way of thinking about things is that you have associated a pervasive anxiety with everything in your environment. In your head, perhaps, you have developed a fear of each thing in your life that you have anxiety when you encounter it. Since you have anxiety all the time, regardless of content, you have learned to associate anxiety with fear of each of these things separately. It is a matter of classical conditioning. You have learned to have a fear reaction whenever you have anxiety. It is simple association. It is something like classical conditioning - Pavlovian. With each associative event, comes an even stronger reinforced reaction.
If I have been wrong, please, please correct me where I am wrong. It will be very instructive and a way to get to know you better.
- Scott
Posted by Dinah on February 13, 2009, at 7:52:10
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e » Phillipa, posted by SLS on February 13, 2009, at 7:26:49
Hmmmm....
Scott has a point.
While therapy has shown to be very effective with both GAD and OCD, sometimes medication is necessary to enable us to do the work of therapy. And a combination of meds and therapy has been shown by studies to be more effective than either alone, if my memory serves.
That's true in a lot of therapy. Therapy stirs up a lot of stuff, and there is supposed to be an optimum level of distress to enable change, not an overwhelming amount. Therapists try to teach distress tolerance, of course. But if you can't get to therapy, that won't be of much use to you now.
It doesn't seem that long ago that you were doing pretty well with driving and going to a store to buy inventory? If I remember rightly, it was partly driven by the energy of anger with your previous therapist? I know I always hate to hear this, but you really do have more internal fortitude than you give yourself credit for, I think.
Posted by Dinah on February 13, 2009, at 7:57:23
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e, posted by Dinah on February 13, 2009, at 7:52:10
On the other other hand....
I have or have had specific phobias where I was really reluctant to work on them in therapy. Because if I worked on them in therapy, it would mean I would be comfortable with xxxx, and being comfortable with xxxx might mean being around it more often or doing it more often, and I didn't want to be around it/do it more often. Until being comfortable with the phobia object feels less scary than being afraid of it, I really don't think my work on the topic would be very wholehearted.
Although once a simple reframing was enough to do the trick. I say simple, but of course it was years in the making.
Posted by backseatdriver on February 13, 2009, at 11:23:42
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e, posted by Dinah on February 13, 2009, at 7:57:23
I am so sorry about what you're going through. If you can get to a GP -- just a general practitioner -- you might ask for an anxiolytic medication like Ativan, just to get you through this rough patch. Once you're on the other side -- and this may happen very quickly -- you'll likely feel well enough to revisit the therapy question and you might find that you don't necessarily need or want it. Honestly, I had terrible anxiety for the longest time and the only thing that really helped was Ativan. I also had a good response to Zoloft for anxiety.
Posted by Phillipa on February 13, 2009, at 12:18:01
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e » Phillipa, posted by SLS on February 13, 2009, at 7:26:49
Scott you're so right before I finished reading I thought "I'm like a Pavlovian dog ring the bell I think there is something about to happen that happens each time the bell rings conditioned to respond this way". I know my pdoc just this last week said it's Gad you have. And hence why the low dose of luvox keeps things manageable only manageable at times. I'm now beginning to even fear the benzos but find staying as the pdoc said at what is comfortable for me which is l0mg of valium, .5xanax, 50mg of luvox which I intellectually know isn't theraputic sometimes gives me a day that's better than nothing. She suggested since had mammogram and no hx of ca in the family small family that compounded estrogen might help. To find a doc who tests hormone levels. yesterday cause of my fear of interacctions only at times when out Greg asked the pharmacist as I waited in the car and he said he does some compounding but no names of docs. See I took a one size fits all compounded combo of the two good estrogens and progesterone a few years back. Not afraid of what I can see and I could see the cream. hence why at one time wanted Emsam as patch could see and rip off if intolerable. Pdoc said too stimulating for me. Also she knows how thyroid affects anxiety etc. I said I knew as did own study when working as when reviewing charts it was incredible how many had thyroid issues and thyroid is a hormone. Also have an Mri which shows a microadenoma on pituitary gland radiologists said nothing. This was when lost taste and smell. Diabetes does run in family so no antipsychotics. So I trudge on and suck on truffles at night when on computer. I have to comment to Dinah now I don't usually read babble during the day. This is an exception. Love Jan might as well use real name as most know it anyway it's fine. ps also down to 2.5 of valium when wake at around 5-7 as up til around 3 after ebay posting and reading a small amount.
Posted by Phillipa on February 13, 2009, at 12:28:11
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e, posted by Dinah on February 13, 2009, at 7:52:10
Dinah it the fortitude seems to come in bursts. One day can do something next day like a turtle and need to pull my head into the body and hide. Those are the day I'll pay my husband to take me just for a hotdog and beg for one more place. One therapist said if don't get out daily I someday wont be able so that is a fear too. You know that therapist when I confronted the owner of a store long story not going into it. I thought now where did that come from how did I do that? And who would think I used to confront on my own no offenses taken please as not about conditions of others only explaining my reactions. When worked locked unit one day a huge man no men working that day was in seclusion for a very manic state and he was threatening staff I very calmly stood in front of him and said to get back in the room. I thought I would be hurt seriously but instead he started crying and went in the room. I didn't yell calmly spoke to him. He later became better nice guy. But from some deep place comes strength at times. Sometimes I fear that I will overreact as something will trigger me. I'm very sensitive and take all thing personally. Sorry such a long post. Love Jan
Posted by Phillipa on February 13, 2009, at 20:20:30
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e » Dinah, posted by Phillipa on February 13, 2009, at 12:28:11
No changes just more fear today and found name of doc who does compounding from pharmacist. Love Phillipa
Posted by Dinah on February 13, 2009, at 21:42:09
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e, posted by Phillipa on February 13, 2009, at 20:20:30
Well, you found out the name of a doctor. That's not nothing.
Definitely I understand how different days can be completely different. Some days I can barely drag myself out of bed. Other days I feel almost energetic. Well, maybe not energetic.
Posted by Phillipa on February 13, 2009, at 23:45:34
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e » Phillipa, posted by Dinah on February 13, 2009, at 21:42:09
Dinah really???? Hard to believe all the stuff you do and work also. Love Phillipa yes now I wonder if he's googleable?
Posted by Phillipa on February 14, 2009, at 12:38:43
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e » Dinah, posted by Phillipa on February 13, 2009, at 23:45:34
Clue everytime the phone rings or almost everytime it's something bad. Or if no one answers I panic. Just a clue. Phillipa
Posted by Sigismund on February 14, 2009, at 21:31:21
In reply to What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e, posted by Phillipa on February 12, 2009, at 12:19:14
I'm never surprised that people should be frightened. It's not much fun, but it is the natural state. But why be frightened of dying, apart from the pain? Most things are illusions. Time probably is. There's just this moment. How much fun can it be? How nice can we be to each other? And then it's over. And rightly so. Everlasting life would be terrifying to me.
I read an Isaac Bashevis Singer book where one of the characters has a son who dies. She becomes very depressed, and after a year of being bedridden slowly comes out of it. Then she explains that she became frightened.
Posted by Sigismund on February 14, 2009, at 21:35:28
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e » Phillipa, posted by SLS on February 13, 2009, at 7:26:49
One of the unfortunate things that some people find is that the drugs (benzos) that relieve fear actually increase it overall, even as they relieve it etc etc.
Posted by SLS on February 14, 2009, at 22:05:50
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e, posted by Sigismund on February 14, 2009, at 21:35:28
> One of the unfortunate things that some people find is that the drugs (benzos) that relieve fear actually increase it overall, even as they relieve it etc etc.
Hmm. That makes some sense. Would you say, alternatively, that the benzos relieve anxiety while allowing for fear? Do you think that this is, perhaps, what has happened to Phillipa?
I don't know.
Interesting.
- Scott
Posted by Sigismund on February 15, 2009, at 0:56:48
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e » Sigismund, posted by SLS on February 14, 2009, at 22:05:50
Scott, a long time ago one of the psych drs here who was skeptical about the use of benzos had this group of benzo dependent agoraphobes stop their benzo use, after which the fear abated, after (of course) becoming really intolerable for the withdrawal, rather like the reverse of benzo use.
If you have benzos to stop your fear, it is rational to fear running out of benzos.
Our world is not good with fear.
It is one of the primary emotions, yet hardly gets a mention in polite society.
Posted by Phillipa on February 15, 2009, at 13:27:08
In reply to Re: What does it mean if you're afraid of everything e » Dinah, posted by Phillipa on February 13, 2009, at 23:45:34
Dinah well put the hormone doc to rest it wasn't an ob-gyn drove by address and a doc for wellness and aging figures. Back to beginning. Phillipa
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