Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 210339

Shown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Roof replacement anxiety

Posted by fuzzymind on March 18, 2003, at 10:57:07

The roof is a complete shambles beause of age, raccoons, weather...hasn't been replaced in over 30 years. My parents visited this Friday and are still here, and want me to call roofing contractors to have the roof repaired. I have been going in anxiety overdrive , procrastinating. The house is a pig sty.....ever see those contests of the messiest homes in the country?....well I could compete. My mom says the roofing contractor would have to come inside and look around, but I insist what is the point...replace the entire roof...lots of spongy areas in the decking.

I called one contractore yesterday, he was supposed to call back yesterday or today. He may have called back yesterday, but I was in one of my depression sleeps and no one answered the phone.

Another point of anxiety is trying to remember all I need for the work....liability insurance, tarp, permits, etc....

BUt the worst part of the anxiety is my parents' past experience with contractors .ALL of them ripped them off. Maybe it was my mom spoke with a thick accent and my dad hid at work so he left my mom to deal with the redneck workers(come on Dr B, don't ban me for this). I don't have the fortitude or commucication skills to deal with crooks.


I would like to just have them measure, look at hte roof, explain what they would do, and I put in what I would need, then they get me a bid. I DO NOT want anyone in this pigsty. PArt of my addiction to avoidance...I probably keep this place a mess so that I have excuses not to deal with contractors and workmen. I am so f****g ashamed of everything about me. This roof needs to be replaced...should have been replaced over 10 years ago. Caused lots of damage to ceilings nad the garage.This house is a microcosm of my life.....damaged, chaotically dishevelled. My prison and yet my place of solace away from the real world. I don't like the real world intruding , which I consider the gas meter reader, which I haven't let in for over 4 years.

HELP!!

 

Re: Roof replacement anxiety

Posted by Tabitha on March 18, 2003, at 14:25:36

In reply to Roof replacement anxiety, posted by fuzzymind on March 18, 2003, at 10:57:07

Hi, I've been there with the shame over a messy house. Mine's just barely tolerable now. Contractors are hard to deal with, there really are a lot of rip-offs, or just incompetents. The best you can do is contact 3 or so, you'd be surprised how much difference there can be. You can just pick the one who seems most trustworthy. I nearly got ripped off by a plumber, I called for faucet replacement, he convinced me I needed thousands' worth of work, I backed out at the last minute, then the next one I called did the job I wanted for a good price.

Regarding the house, if you're not up to cleaning, you might just have to just tell yourself it doesn't matter what a roofing worker thinks of your house. They'll mostly be looking up at the ceiling anyway.

Getting a solid roof over your head will probably feel really good.

 

Re: Roof replacement anxiety

Posted by Mashogr8 on March 18, 2003, at 14:54:06

In reply to Re: Roof replacement anxiety, posted by Tabitha on March 18, 2003, at 14:25:36

Your anxiety is so understood. Never mind the mess. When our house was done, I don't remember the roof contractor coming into the house other than to show us the contract to sign. More importantly, what I do remember is giving the contractor half the money ($2700) to buy the shingles so he could begin work. Several phone calls later (as well as months)_he finally got back from his vacation and ordered the shingles. The truck showed up, waited and left 'cause the contractor never showed.

Lesson #1: Even if the genleman is licensed, give the money to the lumberyard and have the contractor get to work when the shingles arrive. That way he can't finance a down payment for his boat and disappear on you.

Lesson #2: Always check to see if he is "licensed" by your state board of builders. But remember Lesson #1 protects your money far better than #2 does. You can have a warrant issued for his arrest but if he leaves the state.....

Multiple quotes are helpful. One bid was os low we through it out. The third was higher than we wanted to pay. We opted for the second. By the time we hired someone else, the roof (plus the stolen $2700.00)cost more than if we had hired the expensive guy.
Sad words from a much wiser home owner.

 

Re: Roof replacement anxiety » fuzzymind

Posted by WorryGirl on March 18, 2003, at 18:32:11

In reply to Roof replacement anxiety, posted by fuzzymind on March 18, 2003, at 10:57:07

Fuzzy,
Good luck on your roof. I understand what you're going through. I avoid people coming to my house like the plague. I have ignored my doorbell and most telephone calls for days, often because my house had become so messy I was ashamed for anyone to see it, yet I was too depressed to clean it.
Good for you for taking the steps to get your roof replacement started.

 

Re: Roof replacement anxiety

Posted by noa on March 18, 2003, at 19:17:32

In reply to Roof replacement anxiety, posted by fuzzymind on March 18, 2003, at 10:57:07

Contractors can rip people off, but try to go with someone recommended highly by someone you know.

I know such anxieties--just had my heat pump fixed, am hoping it won't mean having to replace it altogether. A roof is a big deal, it's true. Take one step at a time.

BTW, my place is a real mess too, and I decided I have to not let myself get worked up about the repair people seeing the mess.

 

Re: Roof replacement anxiety

Posted by noa on March 18, 2003, at 19:18:58

In reply to Re: Roof replacement anxiety » fuzzymind, posted by WorryGirl on March 18, 2003, at 18:32:11

And don't pay them the final payment until it is all done and inspected!

 

Re: blocked for week » fuzzymind

Posted by Dr. Bob on March 18, 2003, at 21:14:16

In reply to Roof replacement anxiety, posted by fuzzymind on March 18, 2003, at 10:57:07

> redneck workers(come on Dr B, don't ban me for this)

Come on, Fuzzy, this has come up before, it's considered disparaging:

http://m-w.com/cgi-bin/dictionary?redneck

So I am in fact going to block you from posting for another week.

Bob

PS: Follow-ups regarding posting policies, and complaints about posts, should be redirected to Psycho-Babble Administration; otherwise, they may be deleted.


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