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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on October 25, 2003, at 8:48:55
That I was reading my files from the old clinic, and that they had been bound and put in some sort of library. There were also case studies inserted into the notes. I was reading them, but they were so overwhelmingly upsetting that I really couldn't take them in. I tried to sneak out of the library with them, but there was a microchip or something so I couldn't. So I had to try to copy them all. I asked if there was somewhere I could read them privately and they led me to a "chapel" smaller than a bathroom stall. More the size of a confessional?
So of course I wake up and I'm mad at my therapist. How *dare* he put that stuff in my files!!!! (rofl)
I kind of know where the dream came from. My report on the neurologist's findings, and telling him how they relate to his favorite racehorse analogy led him to tell me that my oversensitive and hyperreflexive nervous system was probably why I explained things the way I did. That I was trying to explain phenomenon that I actually experienced but that most people didn't because of my nervous system wiring. I didn't say much at the time, but it brought up all my old anger at things he told my old psychiatrist who in turn told me.
So now I want to request all my medical records from the old clinic and from the psychiatrist. :) But I'm thinking that's probably not a very good idea, because I might find things that will disrupt the therapeutic alliance.
Have you guys asked for your current psych records? I've asked for ones from all my prior doctors (of any sort) when I leave their service - except for the pdoc from h*ll, because I figured there might be stuff in there that would make me angry with my therapist.
It's on my to do list for first thing Monday morning. What do you think?
Posted by justyourlaugh on October 25, 2003, at 12:07:20
In reply to I had a dream, posted by Dinah on October 25, 2003, at 8:48:55
dinah,,
do you want to know what was writting or do you just not want them to have them?
mabe you could leave them where they are..sort of "leaving the problems behind you" moving forward...letting them go?
or..
take them home have a good read...mabe a chuckle or two..a good cry...
then destroy them..
i dont think it would do you much good having them laying on the coffee table...lol
whatever you do you have to let them go...
remember you are so much more intelligent about yourself than what is writting down by some .....(clearing throat)
take some power over little pieces of paper...
have a good day dinah..
let me know what you decide...
my dream last night was about freddy cruger...
7 , 8 better stay up late
:)j
Posted by Dinah on October 25, 2003, at 12:23:20
In reply to Re: I had a dream, posted by justyourlaugh on October 25, 2003, at 12:07:20
:-) I'm sure I'll do nothing. I always wake up from dreams where I'm angry feeling angry. I once woke my husband up to yell at him for having an affair in my dream. :)
I'm quite certain I don't want to know what my therapist thinks of me. On the other hand, I love having a complete copy of my medical records. I have as many as I can put together. But not generally until I leave a doctor. It comes in really handy sometimes. In filling out my headache clinic forms, I couldn't remember how they started or anything. But I found my records from my consultation in the late nineties and all the information was there.
And I have them make copies of my lab reports as I go along so I have on hand a record of what's going on over time.
My therapist has lousy handwriting anyway. I've tried reading my session notes over his shoulder and can't make out a word of them. :)
Posted by fallsfall on October 25, 2003, at 12:58:03
In reply to Re: I had a dream, posted by Dinah on October 25, 2003, at 12:23:20
I think that the usual recommendation is that if you are going to read therapy notes that you should read them with a therapist (not necessarily the therapist who wrote them). The explanation I've heard is that the notes can be very dry and unempathetic, and that us fragile patients might get the wrong idea. At some point I want a copy of mine from my first therapist - in a sealed envelope. The reason is that when I was in 5th grade I saw a psychiatrist for 1 1/2 years, but she had retired and burned her records before I contacted her, so no one knows what was going on then. If I get my recent records, I might have to store them somewhere else, I don't know if I could trust myself not to just read them.
Has he let you read anything? She used to read last week's summary for me sometimes, so I know what kind of stuff she put in.
Posted by Dinah on October 25, 2003, at 13:07:48
In reply to Re: I had a dream » Dinah, posted by fallsfall on October 25, 2003, at 12:58:03
Yes, I regret not having my psych records from when I was a kid. It would throw a lot of light on things I don't really remember all that well. And it would have been interesting to have an outsider's opinion on my family's dynamics. I have my pediatric records but they destroyed my psych records after seven years. And I keep thinking if I don't get them now, I'll never have them if I need them.
He says he puts in the bare minimum. And I guess I believe him. He read his notes back one week when I was feeling worried about something I said, and it just said "client appeared to be upset" or something generic like that.
Nowhere near as exciting as the dream notes, which included applicable case studies and reference materials. :)
Posted by judy1 on October 25, 2003, at 15:49:12
In reply to Re: I had a dream » fallsfall, posted by Dinah on October 25, 2003, at 13:07:48
Dinah,
My present pdoc also writes the bare minimum- mostly in an attempt to protect me in case of legal problems. This is a very real scenario since I just came off a multi-million dollar lawsuit where any revealed manic episodes could have harmed me considerably. In the past any records I was curious about from previous therps were read with the current therp in order to protect me, and I was VERY grateful I had a professional with me at the time- it's not something I would recommend to anybody.
take care, judy
Posted by jane d on October 27, 2003, at 15:09:36
In reply to I had a dream, posted by Dinah on October 25, 2003, at 8:48:55
I think it's a great idea. I also get copies of all my records - with the sole exception of the psych ones. I want them, I'm not afraid to see what's in them, but I am afraid to ask for them. I would ask for the records from any doctors you aren't still seeing - just to make sure you get them before they are destroyed. I'm not sure how long they have to keep them but that's a good thing to find out. Once you have them you can always leave them in a sealed envelope.
I really like the account of the therapist who reads the previous weeks notes. I think it would be great if they would all do that. It would take the guesswork out of figuring out what they think is important - and save you from those horrifying times when you realize they've been on the wrong track for months.
Jane
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