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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Susan47 on November 23, 2004, at 23:21:40
ShortElise, read your post and have to say I think your understanding of therapy and transference is true for me; and I've been raised with so much fear that I used to transfer to *everybody*, men and women alike, and it stopped mne from living my own life, because of course everything I did was perceived, in my mind, as being wrong somehow.
My therapist was defensive, even though he stated that he wasn't; there were certain things he wasn't comfortable with, but I just never did figure out what they were.
He wrote me a letter a while back, and it was extremely defensive and full of transference of his own, although I could tell he tried very hard not to give that impression .. very strict along the guidelines, much like a lawyer. I pull it out once in a while, when I'm feeling strong about myself, and I read it for interest' sake. He never did send me a proper letter of termination, what he sent me was a missive of self-defence and arm's-length pushing-away. Even in his letter, he never did go into any detail about why he terminated me, he couldn't bring himself to be honest about it, whatever it was, and the closest he ever came to telling me was this, "The way you are, the way I am". What is a patient supposed to *infer* from that??? It could literally include any possibility within the frame of human interaction. And of course, a patient in transference (AND gg was right, he transferred too, although I wasn't willing to see that in the summer) is going through many types of interaction, in her head.
Posted by Susan47 on November 23, 2004, at 23:25:54
In reply to Here, let's do this again, Transference, Therapist, posted by Susan47 on November 23, 2004, at 23:21:40
I just want to phone my ex-T and say "You Prick. You Inadequate, Dishonest Prick." Is that transference? I need somewhere to spill, sorry everybody for being so blatant, but sometimes I just feel so angry with these silly stupid transferring men in my life. When I was born, I became one of the most important things in my father's life and I still am, and I HATE THAT. He's a brilliant, twisted man and he just can't seem to stop suffocating me, that's how I feel, like he's suffocating me, even after he dies I'll be suffocated, if I don't go first, I suppose there's always that possibility. Thank you for being here PB.
This is great therapy. Now I'm allowed to be angry, I don't care what the ... thinks of me.
Posted by 64bowtie on December 2, 2004, at 8:09:49
In reply to And again, different but the same, posted by Susan47 on November 23, 2004, at 23:25:54
Susan,
List 15 things you really miss and admire in men. Attach a different name to each attribute. Call them your army and think about how they would solve problems. Mimic them if you like.... I've done this with women and men, so I have an army of WACs and "Ground-Pounders" (soldiers) I use for my guidance. Gets me away from my bad habit of angrily labelling this or that person.
Rod
Posted by Susan47 on December 3, 2004, at 23:38:09
In reply to ..different but the same -- maybe this can help » Susan47, posted by 64bowtie on December 2, 2004, at 8:09:49
I don't know fifteen men.
This is the end of the thread.
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