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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 14 of 14. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 13:21:38
...so I am on the cancellations list with my T, and of course I feel punsihed that he doesn't have time to see me, but I walked out the time before last, so why should he make an effort?
I'm under a lot of pressure right now, and I sure could use some help from him.
I have this weird feeling in my body when I think about some of the things I want to talk with him about. It feels like crying in my bones. That sounds strange, but it's the only way I can think of to describe it. And when I think of the things some of you say here, that your T's have sent you away when you still needed them, I am almost paralysed with sadness.
And I am so upset that walking out of a sessions has an economic impact on him. I never knew that. I think it would have kept me there had I known. Should I send a cheque, even though he hasn't billed me? (This is socialzed medicine here, I don't pay the psychiatrist, the medical system does.)
Come to think of it, I never walked out of a session in the first five minutes before. Only this once. It was usually later in the session. Except one time when he left the room to take a phone call in the middle of a session. Little did I know it was my neurologist phoning to discuss meds with him. :-(
Help.
Now I have to go shopping with my niece, and be a happy, sweet auntie. Watch this!
Love and thank you,
ShortE
Posted by Dinah on July 27, 2005, at 13:26:11
In reply to argh ..., posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 13:21:38
I'm so sorry.
((((ShortE))))
Posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 13:40:37
In reply to argh ..., posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 13:21:38
CAN$276 an hour. Er, per 50 minutes. That's about US$200
I think I have to send him, no, give him a cheque next time. But yikes. He makes a lot of dough.
Posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 13:41:05
In reply to Re: argh ... » Shortelise, posted by Dinah on July 27, 2005, at 13:26:11
thanks, dinah
Posted by Emily Elizabeth on July 27, 2005, at 15:40:27
In reply to HOLY COW $$$, posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 13:40:37
Posted by littleone on July 27, 2005, at 15:53:31
In reply to HOLY COW $$$, posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 13:40:37
Can you think of it as like a bulk discount? You've been seeing him for x years at x times per week at $x per session. I did the math on my T spending a little while ago and calculated that I'd bought him a decent quality brand new car. Or a really nice boat. And I know you've been seeing your T for a lot longer than I have. Jeez, at those sort of $'s you'd think we'd get a few freebies or a bulk discount anyway.
And besides, remember that he was really off that session. Even if he had good intentions, he wasn't communicating them well or connecting with you well. You walked out for a good reason.
Posted by Daisym on July 27, 2005, at 19:50:05
In reply to argh ..., posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 13:21:38
It is a lot of money but...
We still have to pay when they are "off" or when they upset us and we "need" to call again (more money spent) etc. We pay the whole fee when we are late too. I like the idea of thinking of it as a bulk discount. And the reason the cost is so high is that these kinds of things are factored in. I think you are worrying about him too much here.
Can you ask yourself if this isn't something else? This is me projecting...are you actually making up for walking out? Do you need to do this so he doesn't have a black mark next to your name in your permanent record?
I think it is a lovely gesture but you should talk with him about it. Feels like a "gift" in some way.
As far as the crying in your bones, that is such a vivid imagine -- deep, deep sadness at your core. Do you have any idea why it occurs when you think about these things? Do you miss your therapist, so is it that wistful, lonely sadness? Or is the issues themselves?
I don't know how to wrap myself around you so that your bones feel held, but I'm trying. I hope this passes for you.
Posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 20:04:15
In reply to Re: HOLY COW $$$ » Shortelise, posted by littleone on July 27, 2005, at 15:53:31
Posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 20:13:26
In reply to Re: HOLY COW $$$ » Shortelise, posted by littleone on July 27, 2005, at 15:53:31
I FEEL GUILT.
Posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 20:16:25
In reply to Re: argh ... » Shortelise, posted by Daisym on July 27, 2005, at 19:50:05
I can't imagine a thing such as a black mark in my permanent record.
Y'know, I have always had this fantasy about breaking in to his office and stealing my file so there wouldn't be any kind of record. But he tells me that my records would never go anywhere without my permission. It would be illegal.
But do I want to pay him to make up for leaving? Hm. Good question. It sure would make for a lively discussion if I handed him a cheque.
ShortE
Posted by Shortelise on July 28, 2005, at 1:11:39
In reply to Re: argh ..., posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 20:16:25
Posted by LittleGirlLost on July 28, 2005, at 13:52:07
In reply to argh ..., posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 13:21:38
>>> I have this weird feeling in my body when I think about some of the things I want to talk with him about. It feels like crying in my bones. That sounds strange, but it's the only way I can think of to describe it.
ShortE,
I know this isn't the point of your post, but I totally know what you mean that it "feels like crying in your bones". I feel this way ALOT, especially since I can't cry on the outside, and it just hurts SO much on the inside. Yes, it sure does feel like my bones are crying.
About the rest of your post, I agree with the others on the "bulk discount". :)
~LGL
Posted by littleone on July 28, 2005, at 15:52:06
In reply to Re: HOLY COW $$$ » littleone, posted by Shortelise on July 27, 2005, at 20:13:26
> I FEEL GUILT.
I'm sorry, I did pick that up in your post and I guess I was trying to ease that a little by giving you another way to look at things. I hope you're not mad at me.
I know the sad in your bones feeling too. In fact it makes me sad just thinking about that feeling. I think you described it really well.
I wish you could see your T more often.
Posted by Shortelise on July 28, 2005, at 22:28:28
In reply to Guilt » Shortelise, posted by littleone on July 28, 2005, at 15:52:06
No no no, littleone. I'm not angry. Not at all, and I'm so sorry to have given that impression.
The emphasis was on the stupid fact that I feel guilt. I just had to put it out there.
I guess guilt is good for something. Argh.
(littleone)
ShortE
This is the end of the thread.
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