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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 4 of 4. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by youngaddict on January 2, 2007, at 20:12:26
ok. this is my first time saying this outloud. or writing. whatever. i sometimes have these uneasy feelings that deal with sexual things. i can't read the "sex" parts in books, I get uneasy with sex talk..etc...sometimes i wonder if something happened to me when iw as younger? or am i making it up? what is wrong with me? why can't i remember anything?
is it possible that its just my head playing tricks on me. i am a drug addict too so maybe its the drugs.
Posted by muffled on January 2, 2007, at 22:05:46
In reply to maybe i'm just making up memories, posted by youngaddict on January 2, 2007, at 20:12:26
> ok. this is my first time saying this outloud. or writing. whatever. i sometimes have these uneasy feelings that deal with sexual things. i can't read the "sex" parts in books, I get uneasy with sex talk..etc...sometimes i wonder if something happened to me when iw as younger? or am i making it up? what is wrong with me? why can't i remember anything?
>
> is it possible that its just my head playing tricks on me. i am a drug addict too so maybe its the drugs.**Hey is your name muffled????!!!
Don't sweat bout thinking there's SOMEthing. There may be, there may not. But if there's something to be known, it WILL make itself known eventually one way or another.
LOts of people are uncomfortable bout sex.
So PLEASE don't get yourself all tied up in knots bout it.
Kids perceive things VERY differently than adults, so it may be hard to ever know whats gone on in our childhood, if anything.
And sick though it may be, abuse of one kind or another(not just sexual) is sadly very common. So there could be other things in play here.
I'm sorry you had a slip there. 28 days is AMAZING. And since you been off that long, physical withdrawl should be easier. You can do it again. Its hard, but doable.
And your T was proly not so much mad, as sad. But you can move ahead from this.
And looking at the WHY of slips is important, cuz then you can work at avoiding or changing etc, what caused the slip in the first place.
So its OK, your OK.
Take care,
Muffled
Posted by youngaddict on January 2, 2007, at 22:15:46
In reply to Re: maybe i'm just making up memories » youngaddict, posted by muffled on January 2, 2007, at 22:05:46
muffled:
you are awesome. thank you for your thoughts and kind words.
i do worry there is something there, maybe not sexual abuse, but some kind of abuse of some kind. because i am do not remember anything and numb to things and get uneasy feelings about my life.
take care
Posted by Daisym on January 2, 2007, at 23:32:40
In reply to Re: maybe i'm just making up memories » youngaddict, posted by muffled on January 2, 2007, at 22:05:46
Muffy is wise. Don't try to force things. If something is there, it will come out. Or not, as you are ready.
On the other hand, if you know but don't want to know, or say, or tell...using drugs is one way to keep yourself numb. Try to tell your therapist what you've written here, and tell her it is OK to ask questions and push you a little, if you are ready for that.
Sadly, even if you remember some abuse, remembering isn't magic. There is still a lot of work to do after the pieces begin to connect. Good luck.
Daisy
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