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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 20 of 20. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dinah on January 21, 2007, at 17:32:01
That happy time when I add up how much I pay my therapist. I keep the information for each year I've seen him since I started in 1995.
And the grand total is (drum roll)....
not as much as a house, but well over two cars.
Posted by TherapyGirl on January 21, 2007, at 20:34:44
In reply to Year End, posted by Dinah on January 21, 2007, at 17:32:01
You and me both. Most of the time I think it's worth it, but it always catches my breath a little bit.
Posted by wishingstar on January 21, 2007, at 20:53:47
In reply to Re: Year End » Dinah, posted by TherapyGirl on January 21, 2007, at 20:34:44
I just dont let myself think about it. It'd be too much for me if I realized how much I've actually spent. Haha..
Although another reason I love Ginny is that she works at a United Way agency that's on a sliding scale, and I only pay her $10 a session. Shes worth more than that, but I'm not complaining. Anne and Laurie were MUCH more (no insurance for me!)
Posted by LadyBug on January 21, 2007, at 23:05:16
In reply to Year End, posted by Dinah on January 21, 2007, at 17:32:01
I know the feeling well. And I manage to average once a week and on bad weeks twice. Sometimes I think of all the clothes I could buy with the money! It's almost like paying for an addiction. To me anyway!
Wow, is it worth it?
"Rent a friend?" Sometimes I feel that way!!!!
LadyBug
Posted by Tamar on January 22, 2007, at 2:28:25
In reply to Year End, posted by Dinah on January 21, 2007, at 17:32:01
> That happy time when I add up how much I pay my therapist. I keep the information for each year I've seen him since I started in 1995.
>
> And the grand total is (drum roll)....
>
> not as much as a house, but well over two cars.Wow! That makes my head spin.
Life really isn't fair.
Posted by Cecilia on January 22, 2007, at 6:25:15
In reply to Re: Year End » Dinah, posted by Tamar on January 22, 2007, at 2:28:25
It DEFINITELY is an addiction. I went for 7 years in the 90's and it was definitely 2 new cars worth then, who knows how much it would be now. But you keep going because the more you spend the harder it is to fold your cards and walk away, plus every once in a while your paid friend decides to give you a little intermittent reinforcement to make you believe she cares. Cecilia
Posted by Dinah on January 22, 2007, at 7:54:59
In reply to Year End, posted by Dinah on January 21, 2007, at 17:32:01
In general I tood stock of my financial condition yesterday, and was quite distressed.
I know teh answer is to work more. That's the answer on my fronts. And so I shall do.
Posted by toojane on January 22, 2007, at 9:37:29
In reply to Year End, posted by Dinah on January 21, 2007, at 17:32:01
Being mentally ill is expensive in many ways, not only monetarily.I am very thankful I can afford care. I look at street people sitting on sidewalks talking to themselves and often think the only difference between us is that I am lucky enough to be able to pay for treatment.
Therapy is terribly expensive. But if I were diabetic, I'd have to pay for insulin and needles and testing supplies, etc. That's not wasted money. It's money that I'd much rather spend on other things and I would if I weren't ill. But I am.
Posted by Poet on January 22, 2007, at 10:23:37
In reply to Year End, posted by Dinah on January 21, 2007, at 17:32:01
Hi Dinah,
I am very fortunate that my insurance covers 45 sessions per calendar year and that my T works cheap when the insurance runs out. That she didn't charge me anything for November and December amazes me. I would charge someone as difficult as I am double.
I wish all Ts would consider their clients ability to pay like mine does, but I know that it's their job and they need to make enough to survive. I just lucked out.
Poet
Posted by Dinah on January 22, 2007, at 14:13:19
In reply to Re: Year End » Dinah, posted by Poet on January 22, 2007, at 10:23:37
I don't have insurance, but I do get tax benefitted treatment of the costs for most of it, which pays back some.
Poet, I am positive I pay more than any of the other clients, and I figure it's because it takes more to put up with me. :)
But maybe we're more challenging and keep them on their toes.
Today it all seemed worth it. He told me as I came in that his morning had been stressful and I told him that I was coming in needing to crawl onto his lap and curl up, and was it a bad day for that. He gave the warmest smile and said he thought it wasn't a bad day for that. And that's what the session felt like, no matter what we discussed.
Maybe he needed someone to curl up on his lap as much as I needed it. Nice when moods mesh well.
Posted by Cecilia on January 23, 2007, at 8:02:42
In reply to Re: Year End, posted by toojane on January 22, 2007, at 9:37:29
Treatment that works would be worth any price. But when I add up all the money I've paid for totally useless treatment it makes me furious. Cecilia
Posted by mair on January 23, 2007, at 20:57:53
In reply to Year End, posted by Dinah on January 21, 2007, at 17:32:01
I keep these records too, but while I do a yearly tally every December, I don't think I'd dare go back for all the years I've been in therapy, or even just with this therapist.
Once I sat down and tried to think of all the different ways I have lost money on account of mental illness, from decreased income, meds cost, therapy costs, and the unseen things like late payment charges and all the airline tickets which would have been much cheaper if I could get it together to make plans at other than the last minute.
Just thinking up all of the categories was depressing without even going through the exercise of quantifying some of the costs.
mair
Posted by toojane on January 23, 2007, at 21:45:17
In reply to Re: Year End » toojane, posted by Cecilia on January 23, 2007, at 8:02:42
> Treatment that works would be worth any price. But when I add up all the money I've paid for totally useless treatment it makes me furious. Cecilia
This is where I get confused. How do you know if it works? Is mental illness something that can be cured, like a wart. One day you have it and then it's gone and you can clearly see it went away.
Or is it chronic and ongoing, like diabetes, and you only can ever hope to manage it and live with it somehow and therapy helps you do that. But you always need it, like insulin.
How can you tell if treatment is useless? If you are still alive, does that mean therapy "works." What is a realistic outcome to hope for or expect?
Posted by Cecilia on January 25, 2007, at 4:11:59
In reply to Re: Year End, posted by mair on January 23, 2007, at 20:57:53
Well, I guess it works if it makes you even a little less depressed. Therapy made me a lot more depressed and all I've ever gotten from meds was side effects. Cecilia
Posted by toojane on January 25, 2007, at 7:42:44
In reply to Re: Year End-toojane » mair, posted by Cecilia on January 25, 2007, at 4:11:59
> Well, I guess it works if it makes you even a little less depressed. Therapy made me a lot more depressed and all I've ever gotten from meds was side effects. Cecilia
Have you ever been told it will get worse before it gets better? That that is the way therapy works? It gets worse, so much worse, and I tell myself that is because it is part of the process, like the only way out of here is through a tunnel but in the middle of the tunnel is where it is darkest. If you run back out the end you came in, you never get anywhere. Got to go through that horrifying middle part.
I have no idea if that is true or not. Really, how do you know? Not until it's all over, I guess, one way or another.
Posted by Cecilia on January 25, 2007, at 9:00:59
In reply to Re: Year End-toojane » Cecilia, posted by toojane on January 25, 2007, at 7:42:44
Yeah, I've heard that about the getting worse before it gets better. It's a great way for the therapist to keep the money rolling in. I had 632 sessions and it never got better. Cecilia
Posted by toojane on January 25, 2007, at 9:09:44
In reply to Re: Year End-toojane » toojane, posted by Cecilia on January 25, 2007, at 9:00:59
> Yeah, I've heard that about the getting worse before it gets better. It's a great way for the therapist to keep the money rolling in. I had 632 sessions and it never got better. Cecilia
How did you decide to stop? What happened after more than 600 sessions to make you realize it just wasn't going to work?
So you aren't in any kind of therapy anymore? Why are you here at this board? Are you coping with only peer support then? Do you just accept that you are ill and not struggle to get better? Are you even ill? Or just unhappy?
Lots of questions. I seem to have lots of them and hardly any answers.
Posted by Cecilia on January 25, 2007, at 22:55:31
In reply to Re: Year End-toojane » Cecilia, posted by toojane on January 25, 2007, at 9:09:44
I quit therapy after my t told me she couldn't help me, I obviously needed to be depressed and she dreaded my sessions. Of course she had already collected over $40,000 from me before telling me this. Since meds don't work for me I guess I must just be unhappy, not ill, though I have no concept of what happiness even is, certainly can not think of anything that would make me happy. Cecilia
Posted by toojane on January 26, 2007, at 11:26:26
In reply to Re: Year End-toojane » toojane, posted by Cecilia on January 25, 2007, at 22:55:31
> I quit therapy after my t told me she couldn't help me, I obviously needed to be depressed and she dreaded my sessions. Of course she had already collected over $40,000 from me before telling me this.
I find the ethics of some of the therapists who are discussed on this board terribly troubling.SHE wasn't able to help you, for whatever reason, but did she refer you to someone who could? At any time during your treatment did she discuss with you her "dread" and seek consultation for her countertransference.
Just because she lacked the skills to help you, it does not necessarily follow that you cannot be helped. But it shouldn't cost $40, 000 for a therapist to make a determination about whether the treatment they are offering is effective or not.
And I don't understand how telling you that she dreads seeing you is therapeutic in any way. What possible argument makes saying that to a troubled patient acceptable?
Posted by Cecilia on January 27, 2007, at 6:01:08
In reply to Re: Year End-toojane » Cecilia, posted by toojane on January 26, 2007, at 11:26:26
Exactly. She shouldn't have needed 7 years to figure out she couldn't help me. She should have been able to figure that out the 1st month. She definitely wasn't trying to be therapeutic when she told me she dreaded our sessions. She was angry, frustrated, and fed up. There are a lot of lousy therapists in the world. Vulnerable, emotionally needy people are like a magnet for mixed up power hungry people looking for a well-paying career. Cecilia
This is the end of the thread.
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