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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by brassneck on June 5, 2008, at 18:35:00
Hi everyone. I stumbled across these boards about a month ago, not long after I started seeing a new therapist after a yearlong hiatus from therapy. After just a handful of sessions, I realized that I was forming a powerful attachment to him. This was quite jarring for me, as I never bonded with my previous therapists in any substantial way. In fact, I can't even remember any of their names, and my memory is generally quite good. I'm not sure why I never connected with them, really--I could put forth some hypotheses, but I'll leave that for another (annoyingly verbose) post. For now, I only want to say that I was (and still am) quite confused and conflicted about the feelings I was (and, again, still am) developing for my new therapist, and so I turned to the Internet for comfort and insight into my experience. I ran a Google search for forums dedicated to the discussion of psychotherapy, and, well, here I am.
I thought about posting this on the Newbies board, but it doesn't seem very active. I'll probably stick mostly to this board, anyway, so perhaps it's most important that I introduce myself here. I'm not sure what else I should say. I'm dysthymic and suffer from anxiety. I'm a graduate student. As I mentioned above, I'm having a lot of trouble understanding and accepting my attachment to my therapist--not to mention expressing to him the feelings I'm having! Once I feel a little more settled in here, I'd like to post about these things in more detail, as I'd love to hear what others have to say in response. From what I've read so far, there are a lot of thoughtful and supportive people here, and I'm looking forward to getting involved. One disclaimer, though: I'm pretty shy (even online), so I have no idea how well this will go!
Brassneck
Posted by LadyBug on June 5, 2008, at 19:11:46
In reply to An introduction (kind of long), posted by brassneck on June 5, 2008, at 18:35:00
Welcome brassneck!
I'm positive you will find a bunch of understanding people here. It's a great group and has helped me understand many things and also such a good support during the ups and downs of the therapy process.
There's a lot of good books out there that can help with what you are struggling with. My favorite one is Deborah Lott's book titled
In Session
Well it's at the top of this page, click on the link. It's a wonderful book on relationships with therapist's and patients.
Welcome and when you feel like sharing more of your story, I hope you do.
LadyBug
Posted by brassneck on June 5, 2008, at 20:19:35
In reply to Re: An introduction (kind of long) » brassneck, posted by LadyBug on June 5, 2008, at 19:11:46
Thanks, LadyBug! I actually just finished reading In Session a few days ago, and, as you said, it is a wonderful book...I have a feeling I'll be revisiting it from time to time.
Posted by Dinah on June 5, 2008, at 22:28:11
In reply to An introduction (kind of long), posted by brassneck on June 5, 2008, at 18:35:00
Welcome! I'm glad you decided to post.
It is such a difficult thing to sort through, and the guidance is sometimes confusing. In fact, I think I best sorted out my feelings for my therapist by figuring out what they *weren't*. In Session was great. And this board was very helpful as well.
I look forward to hearing your story.
Posted by raisinb on June 6, 2008, at 8:20:51
In reply to An introduction (kind of long), posted by brassneck on June 5, 2008, at 18:35:00
Hi, I wanted to say welcome too, and glad you found this place. Bar none, it has been the most wonderful resource I've found to deal with my struggles in therapy. We are glad you are here.
Posted by brassneck on June 6, 2008, at 9:10:24
In reply to Re: An introduction (kind of long) » brassneck, posted by Dinah on June 5, 2008, at 22:28:11
Thanks, Dinah! I like what you said about it being helpful to figure out what your feelings for your therapist *weren't*. That's something to think about, for sure.
Posted by brassneck on June 6, 2008, at 9:11:54
In reply to Re: An introduction (kind of long) » brassneck, posted by raisinb on June 6, 2008, at 8:20:51
Thanks, raisinb! I appreciate the warm welcome.
Posted by meme3842 on June 6, 2008, at 11:22:04
In reply to Re: An introduction (kind of long) » brassneck, posted by LadyBug on June 5, 2008, at 19:11:46
Hi, Brassneck
Welcome. I'm fairly new here too, but I've found tha just reading other people's posts about their therapy experiences has been helpful. In Session was a great book for me as well, and every once in a while, I reread sections to remind myself that while my experiences in therapy are unique to me, they evoke feelings of attachment, which is quite normal. But I do understand the conflicting feeling of becoming attached to your therapist. I don't like the feeling, but on the other hand, it is what will help you progress and grow.
Anyway, welcome, and I look forward to hearing more of your story.
Posted by Phillipa on June 6, 2008, at 12:46:54
In reply to Re: An introduction (kind of long), posted by meme3842 on June 6, 2008, at 11:22:04
Same here and when you're ready share your story. Phillipa and welcome.
Posted by rskontos on June 6, 2008, at 17:01:54
In reply to An introduction (kind of long), posted by brassneck on June 5, 2008, at 18:35:00
Brassneck,
I would like to add my welcome and support. I can't add much to affection for a therapist, I have issues trusting mine still. But you will find a great deal of support and understanding here at Babble. I have come to think of Babble as an extension of my family.
rsk
Posted by star008 on June 6, 2008, at 17:49:38
In reply to An introduction (kind of long), posted by brassneck on June 5, 2008, at 18:35:00
welcome to babble.. you can find everything here that you want to know. ahh.. that attachment.. it is so complicated and can be so hard to deal with. check the archives and look at what everyone has had to say about it. the attachment was very difficult for me for a long time. i am still attached but not romantically.. it can be very painful..
Posted by brassneck on June 6, 2008, at 18:53:53
In reply to Re: An introduction (kind of long) » brassneck, posted by star008 on June 6, 2008, at 17:49:38
Thanks for the welcome, everyone! I'm really glad to be here--I think it will be a great resource. I'll probably post about some of the stuff I'm going through sometime this weekend...I'm seeing my therapist on Monday and I've got a lot on my mind...
Posted by Lucie Lu on June 6, 2008, at 21:04:09
In reply to An introduction (kind of long), posted by brassneck on June 5, 2008, at 18:35:00
Welcome from me too. You don't have to worry, no one is a newbie here for longer than the first post. Like you I had read the board for a while before deciding to post, which I did very recently. It is a terrific place for working out issues related to therapy and our incredibly unique and complex relationships with our therapists (and other issues of inner exploration, etc). My response to my current T who I've had now for 5-6 years was similar to yours, so look forward to posting with you about it. Leaving tomorrow for a couple of weeks (no internet access), hope to hear more from you when I get back! -LL
Posted by muffled on June 7, 2008, at 11:56:22
In reply to Re: An introduction (kind of long) - Thanks, posted by brassneck on June 6, 2008, at 18:53:53
Just teasing!!!!
Welcome from me too.
Babble can be useful.
Just its good to read all the rules and regs so you don't get caught in a block or something.
Take care,
M
Posted by sassyfrancesca on June 9, 2008, at 12:36:57
In reply to Re: An introduction (kind of long) » brassneck, posted by star008 on June 6, 2008, at 17:49:38
Welcome, sweetie! I am a member of a yahoo group (A MostHeartbreakingLove)....it is for people in therapy who sruggle with all kinds of feelings....love for one...I've been in love with my t for almost 5 years; we've had many deep discussions about my feelings/his...
This phenomenona is called "transference"...But sometimes transference is just a fancy word for the feelings we engender in one another; All relationships have transference.
Again, welcome!!Smiles, Sassy
This is the end of the thread.
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