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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by annierose on October 26, 2010, at 19:05:11
I love my t (most of the time) but sometimes she shares her spiritual views that (I think) are way way way out there. She'll bring something up and ask, "Do you think everything happens for a reason?" and then explain her view of "life and death". She always offers a pretext "this is just my point-of-view and it's not important that you agree ... " something like that ...
But yesterday, I thought, "Are you tripping?" ... This coming from a person who has never smoked, inhaled or popped a pill.
She self-proclaims she is spiritual, not part of any one specific organized religion .. and I'm there too ... but when she started talking about baby soul's and third dimensional world ... she completely lost me - - - in a scary way.
Posted by Dinah on October 26, 2010, at 20:09:54
In reply to 'T ... are you tripping on acid?', posted by annierose on October 26, 2010, at 19:05:11
Oh my.
There are definitely times with my therapist where I understand why the rules against self disclosure exists. I really think that I've heard things from my therapist that, to put it as kindly as possible, have lessened the transference a bit. :)
Maybe it can be seen as a good thing to discover that even the most well put together people have some seriously odd notions. Ok, I'm stretching here for a silver lining...
Posted by annierose on October 26, 2010, at 21:30:30
In reply to Re: 'T ... are you tripping on acid?', posted by Dinah on October 26, 2010, at 20:09:54
About five years ago, I was going on vacation with my family (and my husband's extended family). I was quite upset as my daughter was going through an especially painful period in her life (and I couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel). My t asked if I wanted to borrow a few of her books that always inspired her. One was a "normal" book by Dr. Wayne Dyer - and it was accessible. The other book - oh my! It sent off panic alarms - what the f*ck? It was a "true" story of a woman who despite years of abuse, was able to use meditation to free herself of all her hurt. When she meditated, she saw the "new world" this third dimension where everything, every pain, made sense ... the outer world was full of love and peace ... something like that. It freaked me out.
I did tell her that upon my return that I did not share those same beliefs. It's (still) awkward but she doesn't bring up these conversations very often or I would be running for the hills. It's just when she sees how much I'm struggling, she shares some of these thoughts as they are helpful to her. I do remind her that I don't share the same belief system ... so let's move on.
Let's face it ... I grew up Lutheran and married a Jewish man. I can live with differences - - - but sometimes when they are so outside the lines, it pauses me to think.
Posted by Willful on October 26, 2010, at 22:20:41
In reply to Re: 'T ... are you tripping on acid?', posted by annierose on October 26, 2010, at 21:30:30
Wow, that would really disturb me. If my T had what I saw as irrational or "far out" beliefs about something as important as spirituality, I would definitely begin to have some issues.
It's great that you can isolate these ideas or segregate them so they don't begin to contaminate your relationship with your T. That can be hard to to, but I do think people can be perfectly reasonable, well-educated and thoughtful in many areas of their lives, but on spiritual issues, where there's no proof and everything depends on faith or revelation, can have ideas that someone would find odd. As long as she isn't giving you spiritual advice or in any way pushing her ideas unhelpfully, I suppose it's not harmful.
I"m glad she doesn't bring it up much, because that could be a problem.
Willful
Posted by annierose on October 28, 2010, at 17:18:18
In reply to 'T ... are you tripping on acid?', posted by annierose on October 26, 2010, at 19:05:11
Oh my! She even prefaced her comments with "I know this has made you uncomfortable in the past .. BUT ...". I got very quiet and she got the hint. And she quickly dumped the topic - but it does bother me.
I couldn't come up with the name of the nature of her comments when I posted a few days ago. But she is to the left of New Age philosophies. Today she talked about auras and angels and blue light ... and that's all good for her. Not for me.
Earlier in the session, I shared a story that happened to me on Monday. A car was driving towards me - going the wrong way on a divided boulevard. Despite honking my horn, she was clueless. I moved to the other lane, she moved to the same lane - oh my. Did she have a death wish? Long story short - she finally moved over (still in the wrong lane. going the wrong direction) and as I passed I noticed it was someone that I knew. She was talking on her cell phone. So T brings up this situation - "Don't you think it was an angel that saved you?" ME - "No, I saved myself." What the f*ck?
At least her heart is in a loving place.
Posted by Daisym on October 28, 2010, at 23:24:29
In reply to Re: She brought it up again today!, posted by annierose on October 28, 2010, at 17:18:18
My therapist might have said, "do YOU think" never "don't you think" - but he has told me in the past that he'll hold me in his prayers.
And every once in awhile we talk about astrological signs - not that it gets too weird but *I* know I'm a true Capricorn and he seems to know it too. So it comes up...
I'd want to know how she came to her beliefs since they are pretty nontraditional. Can you ask her?
Posted by Willful on October 29, 2010, at 16:14:25
In reply to Re: She brought it up again today!, posted by Daisym on October 28, 2010, at 23:24:29
I wouldn't ask her how she came to these beliefs.
That could open up a pandora's box, that would be impossible to close down.
I'm glad your T realized that you were uncomfortable and let the topic die. But just her bringing it up would disturb me. I know lots of people do have much more receptivity about these topics than I do. For example, I don't believe in astrology. And obviously lots of people give it credence.
I do think, though, that this isn't and shouldn't be about your Ts beliefs, however she arrived at them. I assume she really believes them-- and if you really find them wacky, I don't think knowing the details would assuage your discomfort. It could make it worse.
Willful
Posted by annierose on October 29, 2010, at 18:28:10
In reply to Re: She brought it up again today!, posted by Willful on October 29, 2010, at 16:14:25
I'm glad that she rarely brings up her beliefs too - and I'm glad I let her know that I don't necessarily think the same way. I never asked her how she came to her beliefs but I do know somewhat - because she tells me - that she has read books upon books about people seeing/feeling angels, near death experience stories and the like. And she'll say she read this new scientific article or bought a movie about blah blah blah ... all pointing to the existance of this wonderful peaceful place out there in the universe.
I think of myself as spirtual - and I do think there might be angels out there - but not in the sense that my therapist speaks of. If indeed an "angel" stopped me from getting killed - why don't angels stop chidlren from being harmed or kidnapped or - - - -. There is too much evil in the world.
Having said that - I know my therapist is coming from a place of wishing I could find strength in believing there is good all around me (hence the angels).
Dasiy - she might have said "Do you" instead of "Don't you" ... I can barely remember her words once I leave her office. And this coversation was near the end of the hour - and as I opened the door to the hallway, she other client was entering. YUCK! That causes major brain drain.
Posted by Dinah on October 30, 2010, at 12:34:09
In reply to Re: She brought it up again today! » Willful, posted by annierose on October 29, 2010, at 18:28:10
I'm glad you tell her how you feel about it. Do you also tell her that it's affects your image of her?
I need to do that with my therapist...
This is the end of the thread.
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