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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by sar on July 6, 2001, at 3:57:14
at the loony bin last week, the assesing doctor seemed to think that i was in a "mixed state." bipolar. i tried to convince him that i was just slightly drunk and relieved to be taken care of, hence my cheerry yet suicidal nature.
the psychiatrist i saw a few days later was a hardliner and thought that i'd simply read too much ayn rand and albert camus. i told him i've never read rand and only 1 camus book, which i did in fact like. this guy joked that "half of all white girls qualify for borderline personality disorder," when i told him my theory that that's what i have?
what am i to make of all this confusion? can any bipolars out there describe a "mixed state"?
thanks
sar
Posted by AKC on July 6, 2001, at 7:15:52
In reply to conflicting theories, posted by sar on July 6, 2001, at 3:57:14
hmmm . . .
mixed state bipolar - I think that is me.
My pdoc has been trying to "label" me bipolar for near 2 years now and I have been resisting like you wouldn't believe (why? I have no idea!). Anyway, I know I am not that classic, manic-depressive type. But, having done much reading, I have started to believe that maybe this mixed state thing fits me to a certain point.
Why? Well this is my description. My depressions are horrible - suicidal, no motivation, that whole thing. But yet, I can fool the whole world. I can go to work and put a smile on my face. I have had non-professionals even accuse me of not being depressed because I could smile! I think this is where the mixed state comes in. Because often when I am depressed, I am highly agitated. I suffer from great anxiety - and this often is at its peak when I am suffering from a depressed episode.
What will often happen with me is that if this continues for too long, I will ultimately completely crash - I will sink completely into the depression. But for a period, which can be many days, I will be zooming and depressed at the same time.
I've really only come to recognize this recently. My latest bout, I managed to kick in a cabinet door - yet, I was closer to committing suicide than I have been since my last attempt two years ago. It is these types of signals that appear to be mixed - the smiling yet suicidal thoughts type mixed.
Hope this helps.
AKC
Posted by Marie1 on July 6, 2001, at 8:05:32
In reply to conflicting theories, posted by sar on July 6, 2001, at 3:57:14
Sar,
I read in other of your posts the quote from the psychiatrist "half of all white girls qualify for borderline personality disorder," . I didn't get it then and I still don't. What did he mean?Marie
Posted by sar on July 6, 2001, at 10:02:45
In reply to Re: conflicting theories » sar, posted by Marie1 on July 6, 2001, at 8:05:32
Marie,
The doctor was a Chicano guy who'd grown up in the ghetto and worked his way up to Harvard--the implication was that suburban white girls are spoiled and flighty and self-indulgent, that basically it doesn't take much to be a borderline. It's a controversial diagnosis anyway.
Posted by Noa on July 6, 2001, at 15:25:39
In reply to Re: conflicting theories, posted by sar on July 6, 2001, at 10:02:45
It may also be that he is coming from the position that BPD is much to much of a catchall diagnosis, and perhaps he holds with people like Akiskal who suspect that many with the diagnosis of BPD really have some form of untreated bipolar spectrum disorder.
Borderline is a diagnosis heavily influenced by psychoanalytic thinking, and I am sure that many psychopharm oriented doctors don't find it a diagnosis that is of much use.
My position is always that a diagnosis is only useful if it is useful. If it helps to conceptualize it as Borderline PD, then do so, but it may be just as helpful to conceptualize things from a different perspective, as well, depending on which aspect of treatment you are focusing on at the moment.
Posted by sar on July 8, 2001, at 1:04:39
In reply to Re: conflicting theories, posted by Noa on July 6, 2001, at 15:25:39
Noa,
now that i've found what i believe to be the rights meds (the klonopin sinks in more comfortably everyday), the diagnosis matters less. tho it would be interesting to know.
I think I like diagnoses and conceptualization because at this point in my life, I'm terribly self-absorbed and all I want to do is read psychology books. & if I can get a bit of info out of 10 diagnoses, then so be it--it doesn't mean I have them, but BPD truly struck a chord with me and reading about it has helped.
thanks, Noa.
sar
Posted by Marie1 on July 8, 2001, at 8:19:24
In reply to Re: conflicting theories, posted by sar on July 6, 2001, at 10:02:45
It's pretty scary that such an attitide is coming from a supposed "professional". Hope I never run into him when I go to "Club Head"! :-)
Marie
> Marie,
>
> The doctor was a Chicano guy who'd grown up in the ghetto and worked his way up to Harvard--the implication was that suburban white girls are spoiled and flighty and self-indulgent, that basically it doesn't take much to be a borderline. It's a controversial diagnosis anyway.
Posted by sar on July 8, 2001, at 23:26:37
In reply to Re: conflicting theories » sar, posted by Marie1 on July 8, 2001, at 8:19:24
Marie,
hee hee!
It was actually an interesting perspective--on PB Rick wrote about PsychoBabble/psychiatry being a gameshow like the Wheel of Fortune (starring Dr. Bob Barker!)--spin the wheel and what doctor/diagnosis have you landed on?
I'd landed on the hippie-yuppie who dx'd me with sp.
I'd landed on the obese frump who'd dx'd me as underweight, general anxiety.
I'd landed on the robot who thought Effexor would cure everything.
I'd landed on the psychoanalyst who told me I'd need years and years of therapy, and that I do indeed "qualify" for borderline.
So it was kind of refreshing to hit upon a hardliner who was basically trying to draw me away from thinking I've got it bad, or that "borderline" is a feasible diagnosis--I can respect that. His message was, Quit feeling sorry for yourself. He fully knew that depression and anxiety anre composed of so much more than that, but at ole "Club Head," I was perhaps the sanest and luckiest patient there--no delusions or histrionic fits, no violence, the staff loved me--Feel Lucky, he was saying, appreciate what you have. I resented the Rand/Camus comments, but I also repsected that he was an old professional doc trying all sorts of tactics with me.
I like all sorts of differing opinions and appreciated him...and in the end he was the one who prescribed me klonopin, which has helped me to feel better.
"Club Head!" you're silly girl, I'm gonna steal that one from you if you don't mind...
love,
sar
Posted by Marie1 on July 9, 2001, at 15:19:51
In reply to Re: conflicting theories, posted by sar on July 8, 2001, at 23:26:37
Yeah - I kinda liked "Club Head" when I thought of it too. No one believes me, but I'm the first person who used the phrase "addictive personality" back in the mid to late '70's. I was referring to myself. Next thing you know, everyone & their mother was saying it! :-)
Marie
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