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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by MaverickZ on January 21, 2002, at 7:45:35
I am 28 now,but when I was 17 I was taken to a psychiatrist. I was made to take a test that rated your answers by percentile based on population polls.
In most categories I was average, but in 4 categories I was to one extreme or the other. The lowest at 2 percentile (meaning only 2 percent of the population had less than me) was Phobia. The top three were at around 86 percentile Obsessive/Compulsive, at 92 percentile was Paranoia, and at 96 percentile was Pscosis.Over the last 11 years I have tried to work on these problems but feel I am not making any progress. I am currently engaged to a wonderful woman. BUT I keep worrying that something will happen to cause our relationship to fail. In addition I put myself to sleep at night by focusing these fears into someone that could possibly come between us and fantasizing about inflicting bodily harm to them.
Keep in mind I am not a violent person by nature and am not a hunter/fisher or in anyway the type of person that enjoys taking life from another living thing. (so I'm not psycotic in the dramatic sense) But these visions, and the worrying seem to be tearing me apart and I don't know what to do or if even some of these feeling are natural.
I find myself questioning wether or not I should be with this person...but it seems most of the reasons I come up with not to be are only in my head.
I find it hard to get rid of the paranoia due to the fact that it (so far) seems to 100% accurate. In that what I fear will happen...tends to happen. Is this a "self fullfilling prophecy"? Or is my "Spidey sense" just kicking in and alerting me to what will happen reguardless? I don't want to spend the rest of my life alone but I don't want to over-compensate and make a mistake either.
So my question is simple is anyone else like this or do I need a shrink?
the "Mav"
Posted by sid on January 21, 2002, at 9:29:22
In reply to Do I need a shrink?, posted by MaverickZ on January 21, 2002, at 7:45:35
Possibly, yes, and perhaps medication if it turns out that your fears and paranoia are unfounded. Possibly couples therapy as well, since your fears include your wife-to-be. One thing is for sure, you can't go on like this. You are torturing yourself and, for your own welfare, you need to find a better way to deal with all this.
I wish you the best.> I am 28 now,but when I was 17 I was taken to a psychiatrist. I was made to take a test that rated your answers by percentile based on population polls.
> In most categories I was average, but in 4 categories I was to one extreme or the other. The lowest at 2 percentile (meaning only 2 percent of the population had less than me) was Phobia. The top three were at around 86 percentile Obsessive/Compulsive, at 92 percentile was Paranoia, and at 96 percentile was Pscosis.
>
> Over the last 11 years I have tried to work on these problems but feel I am not making any progress. I am currently engaged to a wonderful woman. BUT I keep worrying that something will happen to cause our relationship to fail. In addition I put myself to sleep at night by focusing these fears into someone that could possibly come between us and fantasizing about inflicting bodily harm to them.
>
> Keep in mind I am not a violent person by nature and am not a hunter/fisher or in anyway the type of person that enjoys taking life from another living thing. (so I'm not psycotic in the dramatic sense) But these visions, and the worrying seem to be tearing me apart and I don't know what to do or if even some of these feeling are natural.
>
> I find myself questioning wether or not I should be with this person...but it seems most of the reasons I come up with not to be are only in my head.
>
> I find it hard to get rid of the paranoia due to the fact that it (so far) seems to 100% accurate. In that what I fear will happen...tends to happen. Is this a "self fullfilling prophecy"? Or is my "Spidey sense" just kicking in and alerting me to what will happen reguardless? I don't want to spend the rest of my life alone but I don't want to over-compensate and make a mistake either.
>
> So my question is simple is anyone else like this or do I need a shrink?
>
> the "Mav"
Posted by Augusta on January 21, 2002, at 10:03:09
In reply to Re: Do I need a shrink? » MaverickZ, posted by sid on January 21, 2002, at 9:29:22
Hi Mav,
Whether you "need" a shrink or not, I could not say. But it is pretty clear to me that you are suffering a lot more than you should have to.
I think that a good shrink (and the good part is very important) could help you to feel a whole lot better.
Posted by wendy b. on January 21, 2002, at 12:00:51
In reply to Re: Do I need a shrink? » MaverickZ, posted by sid on January 21, 2002, at 9:29:22
Hi Maverick,
I will just quickly add my personal opinion: Yes, it might be a good idea to talk to a therapist. You seem to be having a lot of fears that are controlling you (rather than you controlling your own thought processes), and would probably feel much better if you talk to a trained social worker, analyst or psychotherapist. Ask your family medicine or general practitioner for some referrals, and then talk to each on the phone first, to see what you think of them. Usually your gut reaction to their voices and mannerisms will be the best bet.
You may also need medication, so sometimes it's a matter of finding someone to talk to AND finding someone (an MD) who is experienced in prescribing meds. Make sure if you do have to see two people, that they work together (by phone usually) to manage your healthcare. If you can find someone who prescribes meds and also does psychotherapy, that's good, too (you only have to manage one appointment schedule instead of two).
You sound unsure or afraid to see a doctor or therapist... In my experience, doing this was the first step toward recovering from my "illness," bipolar tending toward depression and hypomanic episodes. So I recommend it highly. Therapy and medication will almost certainly help you... I wish you luck and I hope you will keep posting. There are a lot of people on this Board who can relate on a personal level to what you are going through.
Best wishes,
Wendy
Posted by Krazy Kat on January 23, 2002, at 11:18:59
In reply to Re: Do I need a shrink?, posted by wendy b. on January 21, 2002, at 12:00:51
I was going to post a "Wendy B. where be ya" thread today.
How are you?? Have you heard from sar?
Posted by Krazy Kat on January 23, 2002, at 11:23:08
In reply to Do I need a shrink?, posted by MaverickZ on January 21, 2002, at 7:45:35
Mav:
I'm 30. I tried to handle my illness alone until I was 27. Then I went to a psychiatrist. It was the best decision I've ever made for my health.
Your symptoms are so familiar - I would categorize it as OCD, but I think a lot of mental illnesses intermesh.
I have manic depressive and OCD symptoms. Antipsychotics are supposed to help with these intrusive thoughts. Depakote has helped me, but I do still deal with them some.
It took me a long time to understand that I wasn't a horrible person for having these kind of thoughts, and that the likelihood of my acting on them was nil. It's a difficult disease.
Good luck and let us know how you do.
- KK
Posted by finelinebob on January 25, 2002, at 0:47:49
In reply to Re: Do I need a shrink? » MaverickZ, posted by Krazy Kat on January 23, 2002, at 11:23:08
If you're average weight for your height -- no, you don't need a shrink of any sort.
Sorry, wrong item. ;^)
The thoughts you're having are oh-so-easy to dismiss or justify or rationalize. I got to be really good at it and lost about 20 years of my life because denial was just too seductive. But it's like wendy b. said -- accepting that you need to do something about them is the first (and most important) step in turning things around.
Take a look around here and see what we're all like. One of the biggest hurdles in actually getting up the gumption to track down a therapist and start working is dispelling all the lies society has filled you (and all of us) with about "people who need a shrink". I've been here for, on and off, too long to remember and I've never seen anyone fit the bill.
There used to be (may still be there, haven't looked recently) this huge "billboard" painted on the side of a building at 72nd and Broadway in NYC, about 10 or 12 floors worth of building, saying something to the effect of "Depression is a flaw in chemistry, not in character." That's not the whole story -- "managed care" likes to medicate us more than pay for therapy -- but the second half of that statement certainly is true.
You may not need meds. You certainly don't need to choose a stereotypical analyst and start talking about how you were in love with your mother when you were five -- there are different approaches to therapy that may be more suited to who you are and what you feel comfortable with.
Keep in mind, tho, that (from what I can tell) you're bringing this up because you love this woman and you want things to go right. Both good reasons for communicating how you feel with her ... maybe not right away if you want to work with a therapist first, but at some time. Also good reasons for bringing her in as part of the "solution".
Getting help about how you feel is not a step backwards ... it's a big leap forwards.
be well,
flb
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