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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 6 of 6. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Medusa on August 12, 2002, at 8:52:36
Anybody else out there have experiences of "just not getting it" or other difficulty complying with (often unspoken, unwritten) workplace protocol? Is this stuff a result of depression or somehow correlated? It's certainly a downer to not fit in to a workplace, and to realise that one doesn't care so much ... and it's even more of a downer to be asked to leave, and to not get a paycheck any more.
I have a hard time consistently dressing the part: -I seriously do not understand why I can't wear my bathrobe in the office (I have never done this, because I know intellectually that it's not okay, but in my gut I really do not understand why not) -I expect "style" to be evaluated apart from the work I produce -I feel confused when "style" is rewarded over quality of work
I have a hard time with the social aspect of work: -participation in company picnics, holiday parties and such frustrates me and does not enhance the quality of my work and is not an indication of my dedication to the company -I hate hearing about idiot coworkers' weekends, I think we're there to work and if they can't get on with it, they should go home -I don't like being judged on who from the company I spend time with over lunch (if I can learn something from the grungy gal from the tox lab, and we're seen eating lunch, why should _my_ image go down because she doesn't bathe? and why should the airheads from accounting be the "in" group of women at the company?)
In terms of work itself, I have problems: -if there's no work to do, I don't come in, and in the past I've forgotten to call about this (Big mistake I know, but in my gut it just doesn't make sense to me, and it seems like it would be more of a hassle to my boss to answer the telephone if I call, than to figure out that I have nothing pressing and I'm just not coming in) -sometimes I do extra work, and forget to show my boss or teammates
Okay I've written more than enough - any resonance out there? Any pointers? I've figured out (I think) that clothes are really really important for my work, so I'm getting together suits and footwear etc for my next job.
-M
Posted by Roo on August 12, 2002, at 10:13:48
In reply to depression=difficulty complying with workplace ..., posted by Medusa on August 12, 2002, at 8:52:36
Yeah, I can relate...and thanks for making me laugh
at "I just truly don't understand why I can't wear my
bathrobe to work..." I had a big laugh over that one...and
it's very visual...picturing you in your cube amongst the busy
work bees in your terry cloth robe and bunny slippers.I think it hurts me at work that I could really give a shit
half the time. I wonder, sometimes, if depression, as hideous
as it can be, really does remind you of what's REALLY important
in life...you're on the edge of death some of the time...and when
you've lived that close to the edge it's hard to get all worked up
over whether the numbers are where they should be or not, or what color
labels look best with the case report forms, or all that other shit...I just
can't be bothered to care. Which is probably why I don't rise up in the
ranks. Last week I was feeling suicidal and like life wasn't worth living
and I had my boss talking to me about mailing labels and I could tell she
was getting increasingly irritated by my blank expression of not caring about
the mailing labels and I was getting increasingly irritated by her getting so
worked up over mailing labels it was all I could do not to shout
"I don't give a flying fuck about the mailing labels, OKAY??!!!".I might be this way even if I weren't depressed, I don't know. I probably just
need work with meaning.But yeah, I don't care about rules much, I just don't see how it really
matters much. To me there's only one bottom line: as long as you get
the work done, what the hell does it matter?
Posted by Fi on August 12, 2002, at 11:43:35
In reply to depression=difficulty complying with workplace ..., posted by Medusa on August 12, 2002, at 8:52:36
I think its a really hard one. You usually have a basic contract of employment which includes things like the hours you have to be at work (whether or not there is anything to do). But most other things arent so set.
Some places have an explicit dress code, in others its unstated but still strong, and I've found this unwritten version can be different for different functions (a PA was once told off where I worked for wearing smart trousers- and was told people like me wearing jeans wasnt relevant as we had a different role).
For me, there are three levels. The things you *have* to do (eg things in contract/job description), the unstated things you have to do not to be ostracised (eg wash regularly, not wear a bathrobe). And the office politics, which should be optional but often arent. I get involved in them as little as possible, but that's partly as I have no ambition! Also cant be bothered- I agree we may have a more balanced view of what is important in life eg surviving it.
Of course, underneath all of this is your actual job. In an ideal world that would be all there was, and its all that *should* matter...
Fi
Posted by Medusa on August 13, 2002, at 1:21:50
In reply to Re: depression=difficulty complying with workplace ..., posted by Roo on August 12, 2002, at 10:13:48
> the mailing labels and I was getting increasingly irritated by her getting so
> worked up over mailing labelsOmigod, my first job out of uni was for a direct marketing company, managing mail promotions for a telecoms client. I 'got' the strategy part, segmentation and such - what I didn't 'get' was the great concern over whether the corner of the sky on some envelope was a certain shade of blue.
> I might be this way even if I weren't depressed, I don't know. I probably just
> need work with meaning.Yeah, and the people you work with make a difference, too. It's amazing, the difference between working with scientists and with ad-exec-wannabes.
> you've lived that close to the edge it's hard to get all worked up
> over whether the numbers are where they should be or notGood point here.
> or all that other shit...I just
> can't be bothered to care. Which is probably why I don't rise up in the
> ranks.Yeah, the unspoken dress codes fit in with "all that other shit" for me - at the direct ad agency, looking prissy was a big focus, and we weren't paid enough to pay for those clothes, so mostly the successful people were supported by partners or parents or whatever, and I really didn't see the point of them going to work every day. Did the parents/partners pay for their clothes and send them to work just to get them out of their hair?
I see the point of being dressed for client contact, which was something I screwed up royally in my last job. Of course my boss wouldn't promote me, he probably thought he'd have to train me how to dress properly for more formal client visits and conferences. If he couldn't trust my judgement on how to dress, that's reason enough to doubt my sensitivity or rule-playing abilities in other areas.
What is "work with meaning" for you?
-M
Posted by Roo on August 13, 2002, at 9:38:18
In reply to Re: depression=difficulty with workplace ... » Roo, posted by Medusa on August 13, 2002, at 1:21:50
You need my job...I can wear whatever I want, and often
do. I don't really have any coworkers, or I rarely see
them b/c they're nurses and they work out in the field.
It's no big deal if I forget to wear deoderant one day. I
wore faded cut off jean shorts and a tank top the other
day.I'm not sure what work with meaning means to me...that's the
problem...hard to go for what you want in life when you don't
know what that is...
Something more creative...I've been working in the area of research,
clinical trials for 8 years now and that's just SO not me...numbers and
study's and all that. I guess something involving writing...interviewing
people...maybe using my artistic eye some...anything but office work...offices
are just so sterile...and anything secretarial like (like mailing labels and stuff like
that) makes me want to shoot myself.What kind of work do you think you would really enjoy?
Posted by Medusa on August 14, 2002, at 8:30:15
In reply to Re: depression=difficulty with workplace ...Medusa, posted by Roo on August 13, 2002, at 9:38:18
I thought I already posted a response, but I don't see it even with reloading ...
> I can wear whatever I want, and often
> do.The clothes part, I'll get around, the labels at your job would kill me.
> clinical trials for 8 years nowlike Quintiles or such, right)?
> something involving writing...interviewing
> people...maybe using my artistic eye some...What about marketing for a biotech or pharma firm? Or doing presentations (powerpoint) in this field?
> What kind of work do you think you would really enjoy?licensing for biotech/pharma companies. lately I'm sort of stuck in market research/marketing/general management consulting stuff for factories and places without so much of a direct link to biotech, and I miss working with the scientists and other smart people. I couldn't deal with the medical affairs part of the business though. Problem is, I only have a bachelors, and could never get into law school (one way to get further in licensing) and an MBA is necessary but I would want to do a weekend program, and for that I need a regular employer to sponsor me. So much tape to deal with, so many hoops to jump through - and so many days, getting out of bed and showering and putting deo on and getting into the right clothes is a not-so-minor miracle.
M
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