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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 7 of 7. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by noa on March 13, 2003, at 20:57:26
It's been stressful week. Work is extremely busy and politics as usual has been intensifying. Then, my Dad had a heart attack and has been in the ICU for past few days. He is doing ok now, stable and feeling better. Just waiting now for another procedure and further stability before moved out of ICU. I'm travelling to see him for the weekend.
Yesterday most unusual thing happened--I had what I think is anxiety related chest pain (diaphragm muscle spasm?). I was worried about my dad but not that anxious, but then the morning at work got a little crazy and as soon as I had a moment to breathe, I got the chest pain. I knew right away it had to be anxiety even though I wasn't feeling panicky or anything. Of course I thought, "how ironic to have a chest pain now". But I just breathed deeply a bit and it went away. My work consistency has suffered a bit this week, but that is to be expected. I've done fine with big stuff, but seem to lose the details a lot.
My siblings and I have been in communication several times a day, and I've been calling my mom, too, and have been able to speak with my dad a couple of times. My mom's been minimizing it a lot, but that is what she seems to need to get through it. But we have our work cut out for us in terms of getting my parents to use available services in an emergency. My mom drove my dad to the hospital. First she called the doctor, who said, "get him to the hospital", which to her meant "drive him to the hospital". The doctor later told my brother he did not mean that, he meant call 911. So my brother chewed the doctor out, telling him, if you want them to call 911, then that is exactly what you have to say!" We also want to drill into my parents that calling the doctor is not the best first thing to do--it just wastes time, as the doctor cannot do anything over the phone.
But my mom is still arguing that my dad didn't have a heart attack. For whatever reason, she can tolerate the idea of a lot of other things, but those two words seem to be toxic to her! I think big medical terms are ok because she doesn't really understand what they mean and, more importantly, they specifically are not those 2 specific words, "heart" and "attack". I think it must be some kind of a generational thing.
She is misinterpreting a lot of what the doctors and nurses are telling her. The nurse told us to have only one family member call in for updates, but we asked if we can have two--my mom plus one of us, because my mom's way of absorbing the info is not reliable. The nurse understood and said it was fine, so my brother is our designated info gatherer.
To add to the stress, my heater is broken again (aarrgghh). Thank goodness it is not as freezing as it was, but I still have to layer up on the clothes and blankets, and have dryer and oven on as much as I can.
Washing machine still broken. And, I'm way overdue for serious dental stuff, etc. etc. etc. etc.
But bathroom's still clean and clothes still getting put away.
Very wierd thought I had after I heard the news about my dad: I better get my house in order because you never know when you have to jump on a plane, or when an event like this will bring people over, etc. Isn't that odd? I was thinking about how keeping order is important in case something bad or unexpected happens. Maybe not so odd, I guess. Just surprised me.
Will probably be away from Pb for another few days again.
Posted by bozeman on March 14, 2003, at 0:54:49
In reply to Stressful week, but I'm ok, posted by noa on March 13, 2003, at 20:57:26
Wow . . . what a month you've had! But it sounds like you're holding together very well. Hooray for you (or as parvox would say, Bully for you!)
Will pray for you. Hugs and peace
bozeman
Posted by Dinah on March 14, 2003, at 3:19:50
In reply to Stressful week, but I'm ok, posted by noa on March 13, 2003, at 20:57:26
Noa, I'm really sorry about your Dad. They're doing amazing things now with cardiac care (wish psych care would catch up). My thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family.
I understand *completely* about the family stressors. I can't trust my mom to accurately relay information either (but in the opposite direction). Maybe that's when you start to feel a bit grown up. When you have to take care of your parents.
You sound like you're doing great under the circumstances. But watch out for stealth stress. Sometimes things build up when you don't even realize it (like the chest pains). I'm not saying that to take anything away from the terrific way you're coping. I just wanted to add a bit of advice. Make sure to take care of yourself - build in decompression time (I know that's hard to do, I sometimes give up sleep for it) and make full use of your support system.
Posted by coral on March 15, 2003, at 5:47:03
In reply to Stressful week, but I'm ok, posted by noa on March 13, 2003, at 20:57:26
Dear Noa,
((((((Noa)))))))))) I'm so sorry about your dad.
You've had a terrible week... Pay attention to Dinah's comment about "stealth stress." Great phrase for cellar demons sneaking up on us. Take care of yourself and may sunshine help you through this time.
((((Noa))))))))
Coral
Posted by noa on March 15, 2003, at 7:46:08
In reply to Re: Stressful week, but I'm ok, posted by coral on March 15, 2003, at 5:47:03
Thanks, all.
I'm at my brother's home. He picked me up last night at the airport and we went to see my father last night in hospital. He looked pretty good. He had moved yesterday to a regular room on the cardiac floor, so he was only hooked up to a couple of things--IVs and a mobile heart monitor, which is pretty cool, so if he gets up to walk on the unit, they can still see his heart readings AND his location (I told him it was like "mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom"). Saw my mom last night, too. I'll go back to the hospital today and supposedly my dad is going to be discharged either today or tomorrow. He has to wait a few weeks until he can have the next procedure to open up the other arteries. Apparently the dye from the angio affects the kidneys and they want his to be completely ok before they inject more dye.
I'm a bit worried about his ability to do the stairs at home, but I'll check with the doc myself about that. If need be, we'll rent a bed for downstairs.
Thanks for the support. I am enjoying the visit, especially since Dad is doing much better. It's also nice to wake up and cuddle with nieces this morning.
Posted by wendy b. on March 15, 2003, at 16:19:36
In reply to Re: Stressful week, but I'm ok, posted by noa on March 15, 2003, at 7:46:08
>... he was only hooked up to a couple of things--IVs and a mobile heart monitor, which is pretty cool, so if he gets up to walk on the unit, they can still see his heart readings AND his location (I told him it was like "mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom").
This is very funny - I hope he appreciates your sense of humor, and had a nice laugh... (I think even referencing that show dates us - remember it was on Sunday nights, right after [or was it right before? I think it was before] the Wonderful World of Disney, to the best of my memory...)
> Thanks for the support. I am enjoying the visit, especially since Dad is doing much better. It's also nice to wake up and cuddle with nieces this morning.I am very happy for you that your dad's condition is improving... I'm sure it got scary for you.
Nieces are wonderful, and cuddling is sooo pleasant, but both together, it's pretty close to heaven... Enjoy your time with them...Best wishes and glad to hear your good news,
Wendy
Posted by noa on March 17, 2003, at 16:44:33
In reply to Re: Stressful week, but I'm ok » noa, posted by wendy b. on March 15, 2003, at 16:19:36
Thanks.
Back home now. Dad was discharged yesterday. Got to their house, and spent some time going through all his old meds, and his new scrips, trying to sort out all the similar sounding names, what scrips changed, what was new, what he had to stop taking, etc. It was rather confusing. I think we sorted it out for now. They will see the cardiologist this week for an office visit, so I told them to bring the whole box of meds with them to be extra sure they have it all right.
I thought I take a lot of meds, but you should see his regimen. And his meds cause a lot of risk, where things can get out of whack very seriously and quickly. 3 blood thinners, 3 BP meds, 1 diruetic, 1 arrhythmia med, 1 for gout, 1 for arthritis, 1 for stomach acid because of the risk of bleeding internally, 1 for his eye problem, a multivitamin he has to switch because it contains something that interacts badly with one of the blood thinners, etc. etc. etc. I think there are about 3 more that I don't recall.
Then, back to airport and back home. I was calmer when I was there, and back here, I'm nervous again.
I had a very stressful day at work today, but I'm ok now. I just felt so irritable all day.
I have to do a bit of internet research for my folks on the meds, esp. helping them with food restrictions for certain meds.
A lot of the meds have such similar names. We were getting confused. HOw does a solitary older person handle this? With vision and hearing problems, and perhaps no penchant for asking the docs and nurses questions, I imagine there must be so many people vulnerable to errors--their own and the docs'.
I feel ok because my mom is helping keep it all sorted out, and she is not so afraid to ask questions, especially since I was really promoting that a lot this weekend. My dad not so much. He doesn't ask, partly because he can't hear well, and is embarrased about it.
Anyway, I'm glad I went. He goes back to hospital in a couple of weeks for another procedure. I think my brother will go over there then, although I might also.
The brother that lives nearby got a much needed break from dealing with the medical stuff, too.
This is the end of the thread.
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