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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 13 of 13. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Racer on November 7, 2002, at 18:33:59
Dunno if that makes sense, but what I mean is this:
After going through a major depression, with all the additional things that happens to your life during it, has anyone managed to get off the drugs, get back to work, and not fallen constantly back into the depressive habits like curling up under a quilt instead of dealing with a problem?
I'm tapering off Effexor XR, and almost feeling as if things will work out for me. But then, something happens, and what I need to do to fix it seems too hard for me, so I hide instead of trying to deal with it! It's terrible, and I know I need to give myself a kick in the @$$ and do what needs to be done, but little by little the monster grows into something that will certainly eat me if I confront it!
Anyone here have any words of wisdom for me?
Thanks!
Posted by Lou Pilder on November 7, 2002, at 19:37:26
In reply to Has anyone gotten to Real Life after depression?, posted by Racer on November 7, 2002, at 18:33:59
Racer,
Yes.
Lou
Posted by Alara on November 7, 2002, at 20:58:06
In reply to Has anyone gotten to Real Life after depression?, posted by Racer on November 7, 2002, at 18:33:59
> Dunno if that makes sense, but what I mean is this:
>
> After going through a major depression, with all the additional things that happens to your life during it, has anyone managed to get off the drugs, get back to work, and not fallen constantly back into the depressive habits like curling up under a quilt instead of dealing with a problem?
>
> I'm tapering off Effexor XR, and almost feeling as if things will work out for me. But then, something happens, and what I need to do to fix it seems too hard for me, so I hide instead of trying to deal with it! It's terrible, and I know I need to give myself a kick in the @$$ and do what needs to be done, but little by little the monster grows into something that will certainly eat me if I confront it!
>
> Anyone here have any words of wisdom for me?
>
> Thanks!
Hi Racer,You sound so much like me that it's not funny! So far I have found a partial solution and am not entirely sure that I can sustain it. However, the future looks more promising now so here goes:
1. Try to get some daily exercise, preferably in the morning sun. This is particularly vital if you are prone to SAD and find it harder to cope with life during winter. It is summer here in Australia and I'm putting this routine in place for myself now in the hope that I can get through next winter drug free.
2. Try St Johns Wort as a mild antidepressant. (Allow for a month or so after coming off Effexor before you try it. See how you are feeing without any medications at all.) I have been taking SJW for a few weeks only and have already seen a significant brightening of mood. Vitamin B complex is also lifting my energy levels. Drink plenty of water and eat fresh fruits and vegetables every day.
2. Avoid drinking alcohol in excess. If you can't consistently drink in moderation, quit it altogether. I have had to do this.
3. I relate to the `curling up under the quilt', avoiding problems dilemma big time. :-) While not working, set your alarm so that you get up at a reasonable time each day and start the day with a walk.
3. If you get the urge to go to bed because a problem seems overwhelming, force yourself to stay up and deal with it. Chances are that you are blowing the problem out of proportion with one or more cognitive distortions. Grab a cup of herbal tea and sit down with a book like David Burns' "Feeling Good" . Next write down the problem and list all the thoughts that you associate it. Using Dr Burns' method of challenging your cognitive distortions, begin to challenge yourself. It's amazing how much smaller the original problem will seem. Hopefully it won't continue to weigh so heavily upon your shoulders that you want to hide in bed.
4. Coping with Work: This is the part I'm still working on. I asked a similar question about this on the forum the other day and Geek pointed out the importance of good self-talk as a means by which we can reduce stress. I suspect that a lot of the measures outlined above will help with this. In the past, it has also helped to take a walk for as long as possible at lunch time.
5. If you are determined to conquer your depression the natural way, I strongly recommend another book called "Natural Prozac" by Dr Joel Robertson and Time Monte. (Am currently reading this myself.)
Hope this helps a little. Good luck, Racer!
Alara
Posted by shar on November 7, 2002, at 22:55:23
In reply to Has anyone gotten to Real Life after depression?, posted by Racer on November 7, 2002, at 18:33:59
Yes. I know of at least one person who had a serious depression, the ass-kicking variety, and came through it with only relatively minor relapses that were controlled with meds.
She stayed on meds after feeling better for a while, which does seem to help. I don't know how long you've been feeling better and ready to get off Effexor, but leaving meds too quickly can sometimes be a less-than-good thing.
BTW Effexor itself can cause serious problems with mood during withdrawal. (Lots on this on the meds board.) Good luck to you.
Shar
Posted by Mashogr8 on November 8, 2002, at 15:19:06
In reply to Re: Has anyone gotten to Real Life after depression?, posted by shar on November 7, 2002, at 22:55:23
Hi Racer, It's kind of nice to see you posting here. I had returned to this board about six months or so ago. I've wondered a lot about how you were doing--even posted a thread about "Racer". Now I've got my answer.
My advice is stay on whatever medication is working for you. Long term and repeat depressions are difficult to control, even keel feelings may not last without medicational interference. I always wonder whether I would be in a different place had I not stopped taking Prozac after I had been feeling good for a year or so while I was taking prozac. I tapered off the drug, figuring the depression was cured, without difficulty, but within six months I was totally amd more deeplyl depressed than I had been for years. Unfortunately, I have never been able to get close to being undepressed since that time (over five years). Prozac never again worked as it had previously and I've taken even more drugs and drug combinations than I had taken before Prozac came on the market trying to get rid of the demon. I guess the studies are showing that some depressed individuals will most likely spend the rest of their lives taking ADs just to keep the depression in check. I learned the hard way and am still paying for rejoicing that I was no longer depressed. Shar's response seems to echo mine.
I am so glad to hear that your life has evened out. Aare you still working with horses? Have you moved to a more poppulated area? What's been going on in the last two years, if you don't mind my asking?MA (used to be Mary in 99 and 00)
Posted by coral on November 9, 2002, at 8:21:01
In reply to Has anyone gotten to Real Life after depression?, posted by Racer on November 7, 2002, at 18:33:59
Hey, Racer!!!
Yes, I have gotten back to Real Life after a real kicking-in-the-teeth, or as Shar said, ass-kicking depression. I lost virtually everything in my life and when I was on the other side of the depression, I had to expend huge amounts of energy rebuilding, not just "getting on with" life (if that makes any sense). (I'll be more than happy to share details of my particular trip to hell if you like.) The view of life, on this side, is markedly different now. There is some damage that was/is permanent and I've also gained some wisdom. I've had a couple of minor relapses that were corrected with meds and therapy. Coming off meds, for me, included a couple of false starts - I was doing it too fast. However, during the relapses, my anchor med (zoloft) worked like a charm. I needed to allow myself to grieve because I was NEVER going to be the same as I was pre-depression and had lost some "fire" as well as gained some things I needed to monitor, such as stress levels. I also gained a gentleness toward myself. I believe I know exactly what you mean about facing things that are "too hard" --- I've had to develop a high awareness about my own strength levels and determine if I should proceed and tackle whatever -- or hide under the comforter and, in my opinion, both are very viable options. I'm certainly NOT going to tell you that I'm an "enriched" person and a better person having gone through a depression - it was devastating and I'm a changed person. However, there is joy in my life (took me awhile to learn how to experience joy again) ... and I'm functioning!!! I'm doing better than functioning, actually. My life is great and I keep a sharp eye out for "cellar demons." I hope this helps.
Posted by mair on November 11, 2002, at 20:51:41
In reply to Re: Has anyone gotten to Real Life after depression?, posted by coral on November 9, 2002, at 8:21:01
Hi Racer
I, too, was wondering what happened to you. I'm glad to hear that things are going pretty well.
I can't say that I've ever really gotten over depression, however I would echo what some others are saying about meds. Also, what's been remarkable to me, is how much I have ignored symptoms of depression onsets, even though I should be more attuned to them certainly than the general public. I think there's this huge denial and a tendency to think that my depressive feelings are caused by some screw up on my part and not simply indicative of being depressed. In retrospect, one thing that hurt me was not getting help quickly enough. I think the longer you go sometimes the deeper you fall and the harder it is to pick yourself back up.
Mair (also formerly ksvt)
Posted by shar on November 12, 2002, at 9:39:09
In reply to Re: Has anyone gotten to Real Life after depression?, posted by mair on November 11, 2002, at 20:51:41
It is always so good to hear success stories.
Coral, I think your statements about post-depression life are the most eloquent I've seen. It's so true that we are not ever our pre-depression selves again, and such a trap to think we will be (imho). Points well taken, and added to the fact that there is the potential for joy on the other side, gives a realistic horizon a brighter look.
Mair/ksvt, what you are saying is so true and something I do, and I bet a lot of us do despite how vigilant we think we are being. I think I just so hate the thought of 'going down that road' again it is easy to try to ascribe things to other events.
Great to see your names, and hear from y'all.
Shar
Posted by Gracie2 on November 12, 2002, at 21:02:31
In reply to Real Life after depression? Coral, mair, posted by shar on November 12, 2002, at 9:39:09
I don't really have anything new to add here, just throwing in my opinion.
Like everyone else said, there is life after depression, even though it is a changed life. You're not necessarily worse off than you were before, but your focus shifts.
-G
Posted by TheProf on November 13, 2002, at 8:31:54
In reply to Re: Real Life after depression? , posted by Gracie2 on November 12, 2002, at 21:02:31
> Many years ago (decades) I went through 8 weeks of hospitalization for severe depression with ECT, drugs the whole works and finally came out feeling great. My doctor kept suggesting that I try to get off the meds so each time I felt really good for a period of time I would reduce the meds. Each time I would plunge back into depression. I have read that now they believe that each time one suffers a significant depressive episode, it permanently increases the likelyhood of more in the future and makes them harder to treat. I have taken at least 10 different anti-depressants over the years and am currently looking for something that really works.
I guess a lot of people "beat" depression, but constantly trying and failing, as I did, it not wise, in my humble opinion.
> I don't really have anything new to add here, just throwing in my opinion.
> Like everyone else said, there is life after depression, even though it is a changed life. You're not necessarily worse off than you were before, but your focus shifts.
> -G
Posted by bookgurl99 on November 19, 2002, at 23:16:41
In reply to Has anyone gotten to Real Life after depression?, posted by Racer on November 7, 2002, at 18:33:59
All I can say is that, having encountered several major depressions, real life can return. I am still on meds for OCD, however I feel normal and definitely not depressed or 'medicated'. :D
good luck,
bookgurl99
Posted by Skinny_and_dark on January 30, 2005, at 13:07:09
In reply to Re: Has anyone gotten to Real Life after depression?, posted by bookgurl99 on November 19, 2002, at 23:16:41
Hi can anyone help me understand my situation.
I'm a 44 years old female professional. I have a long history of depression. I'm still on meds (paroxetine 10 mg daily). I'm gradually reducing the meds to zero. As for life after depression, I'm functioning ok. I work, I pay my bills, I socialise, I enjoy the movies, I take my holidays, etc. There is only one thing that really bugs me - I am "dead" to my job. I see my work colleagues living and breathing their jobs but I am like a zombie. I've lost my "fire". I never used to be like this. Is this the depression or is this me being bored ?
There are so many wankers at work constantly putting women down. They get to me. I feel helpless and trapped. Sometimes I feel like dropping out of society to live like a tramp. I also imagine myself running away from everything and moving restlessly from state to state.
I don't know how long I can hold out. Someone please help me.
Posted by Angielala on February 1, 2005, at 12:39:34
In reply to Re: Has anyone gotten to Real Life after depression?, posted by Skinny_and_dark on January 30, 2005, at 13:07:09
This is all I have figured out...
"After" depression life is different.. is it our brains? No.. it's us figuring out that life isn't what "normal" people think it is. We see it differently because we see that dark side of it too... is this a bad thing- yeah, for us, during that dark time... but when we are out of it, we can use it to our advantage... I know this sounds hokey, but we can better balance our lives knowing what is really important.
Firstly, our health. We start figuring out our triggers, and then we can stay away from those. Like my mother-in-law for example. She drives me crazy (literally). She makes me feel sick constantly and makes me feel like less of a person. So what I did, was figure out what compells her to do that. I found that she has been looking for an "inferior role model" for years. For years this lady has been made to feel "dumb". Now I realize it's not me, and when she starts that crap, I now know what to fire back with... "Gee, Ma, you seem pretty mean today" and then she feels horrible, and tries to explain what she means... just seeing her stumble over words and feeling embarassed makes me feel better. Is this a bad thing... some might think so- but truth is, why should I feel like I need to make people feel comfortable when they don't think twice about helping me out? It seemed harsh at first, but now it seems to keep her in line, and makes her think before she says something to me...
That's just one random example... I guess to sum it up, once we start getting out of that depressed way of thinking, we can start gaining control. Just realize it doesn't happen over night. And each step you take, as small as it might seem to you, reward yourself... even if you have someone else pressuring you to make bigger steps. Honestly, think "Screw them" if people don't understand, it's not your fault, and you shouldn't feel as thought you need to explian every single thing to them. With time you'll figure out how to explain things, how to avoid triggers and you'll see that it's an uphill battle that we can turn into a plateau... as long as we go at our own pace. That's Real Life, despite what "normal" people might say/think.
Just a thought...
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