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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Fi on June 19, 2006, at 16:03:42
I dont know why. It started when I gave myself 'permission' not to open it while I had a short episode of depression, and havent got going since.
I've set up various direct debits, so some bills get paid automatically. But not all of them. My house insurance ran out for a couple of weeks (until someone from the insurance company rang me).
But the biggest shock is that I have just received a magistrate's summons for non-payment of council tax. (I dont know how that 'translates' in the US- its the local court that does basic things, like for non-payment of the local tax).
I very lucky as I do have the money, which is just as well (its £759.46 plus £82.30 in extra costs for the court action).
On a less crucial level, I get savings advice from an expert advisor. I havent even opened any of his letters in the last year.
Anyone else not opening their letters?
What I am trying to do- which I would recommend to anyone else- is to at least open the letters. Even if you cant face reading the letter properly, it gives you the chance to spot anything you must act on.
But even tho I know this, I have loads of difficulty in doing it. It was complete chance that I actually opened the letter with the summons. Thank goodness I did- I can hopefully avoid the court action by paying up in time.
Its really scarey and it feels really pathetic not to do something so straightforward, particularly as I'm not particularly down at the moment.
Fi
Posted by Tamar on June 19, 2006, at 16:21:16
In reply to Anyone else not opening their mail?, posted by Fi on June 19, 2006, at 16:03:42
> I dont know why. It started when I gave myself 'permission' not to open it while I had a short episode of depression, and havent got going since.
I haven’t opened my mail in months. Fortunately my husband opens most of it. Every now and then he stops opening the mail, and things get very bad.
> I've set up various direct debits, so some bills get paid automatically. But not all of them. My house insurance ran out for a couple of weeks (until someone from the insurance company rang me).
My husband forgot to tell one of the finance companies when we moved house, and then he accidentally stopped paying them. We didn’t realise for two years. It was a savings thingy, so they’re not after us. But we lost about $10,000.
> What I am trying to do- which I would recommend to anyone else- is to at least open the letters. Even if you cant face reading the letter properly, it gives you the chance to spot anything you must act on.
If you go to the citizens’ advice bureau they will sit and open the letters with you. If you have to do it every month they will still help you. And they’ll help you make a payment plan if necessary.
> But even tho I know this, I have loads of difficulty in doing it. It was complete chance that I actually opened the letter with the summons. Thank goodness I did- I can hopefully avoid the court action by paying up in time.
You should be OK. No one likes having to take people to court: it’s expensive and time-consuming. So if you move fast I’m sure you’ll be OK.
> Its really scarey and it feels really pathetic not to do something so straightforward, particularly as I'm not particularly down at the moment.
I often don’t open the mail even when I’m not depressed. It’s just one of those little things in life that I hate doing. I also hate brushing my teeth, but fortunately I have a personal taboo against leaving the house without brushing my teeth.
I guess the important thing is to recognise when there’s a problem and find ways of solving it that you can live with. Forcing yourself to open the mail might not be the best thing for you. Inviting a trusted friend over for some tea/wine/cake and mail-opening might be a good plan, or going to the citizens’ advice bureau at the beginning of the month…. Or whatever it takes to make you feel safe.
Posted by gardenergirl on June 19, 2006, at 16:25:30
In reply to Re: Anyone else not opening their mail? » Fi, posted by Tamar on June 19, 2006, at 16:21:16
Oh, me too. In fact, I got into some serious financial trouble long ago when I stopped opening my mail and paying my bills. I think this was probably the worst depressive episode I've ever had. Definitely the one that did the most damage. :(
I get that way with email, too. I've got a ton of unopened emails related to certain obligations I have that I just can't seem to bring myself to do.
Avoidance is my middle name, unfortunately. I sure wish it was Grace instead.
gg
Posted by Phillipa on June 19, 2006, at 16:46:12
In reply to Re: Anyone else not opening their mail?, posted by gardenergirl on June 19, 2006, at 16:25:30
My husband opens all the mail addressed to him and I open my own and pay my own bills on my mesly disability. After pdocs and meds there is nothing left . Which means no new clothes or any thing that is exclusively for me. I even had to pay for the plants for yard. It's not fair, Love Phillipa
Posted by Fi on June 22, 2006, at 16:33:38
In reply to Anyone else not opening their mail?, posted by Fi on June 19, 2006, at 16:03:42
This is the end of the thread.
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