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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Deneb on July 15, 2007, at 17:16:44
I had a big argument with my Mom yesterday about going to D.C. to meet Babblers. She told me Babblers aren't real friends, that they are all fake and useless friends because they are so far away. My Mom said I would be wasting my money. I was really excited about going to D.C., but now I feel bad. I don't want to upset my Mom this much. I think my Mom hates Babble. She thinks spending time on Babble will mean I won't spend time with friends. I don't see that happening. I went downtown with friends on Canada Day. I think Babble lets me practice socializing.
Now I'm starting to doubt if I can handle going to D.C. I might get lost. What if I board the wrong plane or take the wrong bus? I don't know what to do.
I'm not sure I'm strong enough to go against my Mom's wishes.
Deneb*
Posted by Racer on July 15, 2007, at 20:16:23
In reply to My Mom doesn't want me to go to D.C., posted by Deneb on July 15, 2007, at 17:16:44
Deneb, sweetheart, you are strong enough to go, if you want to, and you're not going to get onto the wrong plane, or bus, or train. First of all, you almost can't get onto the wrong plane anymore, with all the security checks!
But here's the thing -- you are an independent entity from your mother. I think it might be hard for each of you to recognize that. It's hard for a lot of people to make that sort of growth -- mothers as well as daughters. I get the impression your parents have sheltered you a lot, haven't encouraged you to branch out on your own? And it is especially hard for you to work towards independence, when they're putting pressure on you to remain their little girl.
Whether you go to DC or not, sweetheart, is up to you. You're the only one who can decide if you want to go enough to take the risk. You've made such strides lately, I'm sure you can do it. On the other hand, if you're not sure you want to risk it, that's fine, too. If you think you've been a little more fragile lately, maybe it is wisest to stay home -- only you can really know what's best in that regard.
I wish you the best, whatever you do.
Posted by Phillipa on July 15, 2007, at 21:34:01
In reply to Re: My Mom doesn't want me to go to D.C. » Deneb, posted by Racer on July 15, 2007, at 20:16:23
Deneb I remember you saying exactly the same things about the last babble party and you did great and was so proud of yourself. You know you can do it. Love Phillipa
Posted by Deneb on July 16, 2007, at 1:43:52
In reply to My Mom doesn't want me to go to D.C., posted by Deneb on July 15, 2007, at 17:16:44
I feel bad right now. I think I need a Babble break. Don't know when I'll be back.
Posted by Sigismund on July 16, 2007, at 2:29:28
In reply to My Mom doesn't want me to go to D.C., posted by Deneb on July 15, 2007, at 17:16:44
>She told me Babblers aren't real friends, that they are all fake and useless friends because they are so far away.
Well, some of them are (as she said) far away, but it doesn't mean that the interactions here are fake.
Such interactions (for example on Admin) seem very real to me.People reach out where they can, and here we are, or me at least.
Where is DC? Is that Washington? District Columbia?
Posted by Phillipa on July 16, 2007, at 19:09:53
In reply to Re: My Mom doesn't want me to go to D.C., posted by Sigismund on July 16, 2007, at 2:29:28
Yes it is good on geography my Deccie. Love Phillipa
Posted by Michael83 on July 17, 2007, at 20:22:42
In reply to My Mom doesn't want me to go to D.C., posted by Deneb on July 15, 2007, at 17:16:44
I met my best friend online 4 years ago and care about her more than I do anyone I ever met in real life.
People online are real people.
I wonder if your mom knows of all the people she never had the chance to meet on the internet in her day, but didn't because the internet didn't exist. Instead confined to her own small geographic location.
I think people who don't use the internet a lot think that when you stare at a computer, it's like reading a book, you're holing yourself up into a set of pages. But I think of it as a window to the entire world. Like you're hovering around the planet with a magnifying glass, with access to anything and anyone.
I think you should do what you want to do Deneb. Your mom will get over it. But if you do travel, be careful, DC is a dangerous city.
Posted by Kath on July 18, 2007, at 14:14:23
In reply to Re: I don't think I'm going, posted by Deneb on July 16, 2007, at 1:43:52
Hi Deneb, Can't remember how old you are?
You did GREAT in Toronto, remember?
Whatever you decide, there'll always be other reunions if you decide not to go.
My 31 year old daughter met her wonderful boyfriend ('almost fiance' - there's a ring in the picture). You CAN have friends who truly care about you online, but maybe for some people - maybe parents who are really protective in particular - I can see how they could feel like your Mom. I'm sure she's not the only one.
I have seen you grow SO much since I've been on PB over the last year or so Deneb.
Good for you - going out with your friends. If you're not isolating, I think you're right - that here can be practice in socializing.
I send you hugs, luv, Kath
This is the end of the thread.
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