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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on November 1, 2007, at 18:50:25
Ohhh how my emotions just reel, as it's that time of year. I hate 'anniversaries' because of this. She would have been 35. 10 years...I miss that love so badly...but I finally think I am ready for new love.
I WANT to be loved SOOO bad. (Who doesn't??...yes I know, but....) Well, back to the 'personals'...ha. Should I feel guilty?Jay
Posted by Racer on November 1, 2007, at 23:18:13
In reply to 'It Was You'..was 'our' song...sad anniversary :-(, posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on November 1, 2007, at 18:50:25
I don't know the story, so forgive me if what I say is based on a misunderstanding.
If she loved you, I'm sure she would want you to move on with your life, including finding someone who would love you as well. She has a place in your heart which will never belong to anyone else, so you don't need to feel guilty about anything.
I hope that helps. And I met my husband through Match.com, so I know it is possible to find some pretty interesting people.
Best luck to you.
Posted by Phillipa on November 1, 2007, at 23:18:29
In reply to 'It Was You'..was 'our' song...sad anniversary :-(, posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on November 1, 2007, at 18:50:25
Jay what do you feel she would want for you? No I wouldn't feel guilty. Love Phillipa
Posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on November 3, 2007, at 10:14:04
In reply to No guilt, posted by Racer on November 1, 2007, at 23:18:13
> I don't know the story, so forgive me if what I say is based on a misunderstanding.
>
> If she loved you, I'm sure she would want you to move on with your life, including finding someone who would love you as well. She has a place in your heart which will never belong to anyone else, so you don't need to feel guilty about anything.
>
> I hope that helps. And I met my husband through Match.com, so I know it is possible to find some pretty interesting people.
>
> Best luck to you.Hi..thank you Racer. Of course, when we are depressed, it magnifies things 1000000x. I know of numerous people who have lost their families. who have also come back strong, with maybe a bit of a darker take on life (enter cynicism..heh) but have also become radient, rich in passion people. I'll keep what you said in mind. Thank you very kindly...
Jay
Posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on November 3, 2007, at 10:16:24
In reply to Re: 'It Was You'..was 'our' song...sad anniversary :-( » Jay_Bravest_Face, posted by Phillipa on November 1, 2007, at 23:18:29
> Jay what do you feel she would want for you? No I wouldn't feel guilty. Love Phillipa
Well, it's my apathy and depression I think at play here. I want it all "like before", and of course it'll never be that way. I've got to do something to bolster my self-confidence, though, that is for sure.
Thank you Phillipa..:)
Jay
Posted by Racer on November 3, 2007, at 10:31:37
In reply to Re: No guilt » Racer, posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on November 3, 2007, at 10:14:04
>
> I know of numerous people who have lost their families. who have also come back strong,True, and there are those who don't ever have any sort of meaningful recovery. Comparisons don't help anyone, but they're one of the best ways I've found to beat myself up beyond belief, so that I feel even worse. I hope you're not making comparisons, because I don't think they're helpful.
And for what it's worth, I still cry sometimes about my grandmother. She's been dead for more than 24 years -- 8:10 AM, 11 September 1983. I don't think there's anything wrong -- just shows that she left me something lasting, something of value.
Best advice I can offer, is if you're going to compare yourself to anyone, compare yourself to the JayBravestFace you've always wanted to be, and see how you can improve on that. Personally, you're a pretty darn good JBF, if anyone asks me.
Good luck.
Posted by Phillipa on November 3, 2007, at 20:06:47
In reply to Re: No guilt » Jay_Bravest_Face, posted by Racer on November 3, 2007, at 10:31:37
And Jay the loss of a fiancee and unborn baby is not to be forgotten. I think she would want happiness for you. But it is normal on anniversary dates to grieve the loss and then try and move on. You can do it I know you can. You're a wonderful person. Love Phillipa
Posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on November 4, 2007, at 23:02:10
In reply to Re: No guilt » Jay_Bravest_Face, posted by Racer on November 3, 2007, at 10:31:37
> >
> > I know of numerous people who have lost their families. who have also come back strong,
>
> True, and there are those who don't ever have any sort of meaningful recovery. Comparisons don't help anyone, but they're one of the best ways I've found to beat myself up beyond belief, so that I feel even worse. I hope you're not making comparisons, because I don't think they're helpful.
>
> And for what it's worth, I still cry sometimes about my grandmother. She's been dead for more than 24 years -- 8:10 AM, 11 September 1983. I don't think there's anything wrong -- just shows that she left me something lasting, something of value.
>
> Best advice I can offer, is if you're going to compare yourself to anyone, compare yourself to the JayBravestFace you've always wanted to be, and see how you can improve on that. Personally, you're a pretty darn good JBF, if anyone asks me.
>
> Good luck.
>
>Hahaa,,thank you for the nice post Racer. The 'Bravest Face'...comes from a line.."In the whole wide world there is no magical place, so you might as well rise and put on your bravest face.". Even when we are trembling in fear...maybe no escape..that is all we can do, really. I am sorry to hear about that haunting memory with your grandmother. But, I also think it is brave and strong to cry, too. I think many people on here deserve that tribute, faced against the most horrid of odds, and I've seen you do it too. So...a toast to our charms! :)
Peace,
Jay
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