Posted by Victoria on April 27, 1999, at 14:40:39
In reply to Re: What is this?, posted by mila on April 24, 1999, at 17:15:56
Mila, I have a similar thing--waking up many mornings with a new mood that affects everything I think and feel. It's very hard to explain to people who have not experienced it (including my psychiatrist). But I am finding that, now that I'm on an effective anti-depressant, this is changing. I still have these biologically-based changes, but more and more, I am experiencing them as "I am feeling this way" rather than "This mood is overtaking me." A shift of emphasis, but a very important one for my sense of self. Are you on effective meds?
> It seems that depression and/or psychopharmic medications tend to induce many strange symptoms. For example, I experienced three weeks of hell in the form of severe paranoia. I would fear the roof over me would cave in on me, the car I was in would crash, and that my loved ones would die in a horrible accident. I was overcome with prolonged feelings of fear which made my body weak and shakey. But in three weeks, all of this just stopped. I thought it all very strange. These experiences which effect my emotional and intellecutual make up, and which change every few days or weeks have given me a sense of loss of control over who I am. Although I believe that we are defined completely by our biology. It is very frustrating and bewildering to constantly feel the sense that I have no say in what my fears, wants, and beliefs are.
>
> > I never had a problem with this until diagnosed as bi-polar (manic-depressive). The thing is this--I don't feel safe in a car when someone else is driving. It's fine when I'm driving. I'm not picky about who is driving...just anyone else and I kind of go rigid and get a little frantic. Here lately, I've been trying to avoid overreacting, but my husband got lost trying to find a friends house and I lost it. Why do I keep doing this?
poster:Victoria
thread:5263
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990501/msgs/5362.html