Posted by C on May 9, 1999, at 13:51:05
In reply to Major vent here, nothing more, posted by C on May 7, 1999, at 15:58:41
Thank you all for you response. Phil, I wish I could put this one on AA or something but there isn't anything like that.
This has to be the worst mothers day ever. My first one he forgot I was one and now he just wants to argue. I swear, he made a commitment not to let me enjoy just one of these days. LOL
We have been arguing for 2 days straight, kids noticed it even. I wanted to take them somewhere nearby and have some fun but not a chance. Instead he wants me to stay in and clean. I admit, the house is upside down. I honestly cannot get myself to do much. It never gets noticed, just the messes do. I am getting so picked apart here I just don't know how much longer I can hold on. With my husband outside with the kids right now, all I can think about is how many pills would it take to do it right? God! I feel so guilty because I am a mother, these things should NOT be going through my head. How do you all force yourself into life and to keep going? Just talking when I need to in the house to anyone is taking so much effort. I know going off my meds didn't help but I couldn't stand being so tired all the time. I know I am going to hear about it later but I am off to try and show the kids a good time at a fun place nearby. I felt ready to break down this morning at brunch. My husband barely said two words to me and then we came straight home after that and church because he wanted to tidy up. Ya right, he woke up from a nap nearly two hours after getting in the door. I feel like such a doormat. What's worse is we are broke and I was checking the paper for a job (one for nights so I won't have to put the kids in daycare)and I realized that I am not qualified for anything in my area at all. Guess I shouldn't have quit school, duh! I can be a telemarketer for min. wage but don't speak both languages spoken in my area, just the one. I guess something will come up soon, it's just frustrating.
poster:C
thread:5713
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990501/msgs/5788.html