Posted by DL on July 24, 1999, at 23:24:39
In reply to Re: EMDR - for DL and Elizabeth, posted by Toby on July 22, 1999, at 9:10:04
> Now, to Dottie,
> I can tell a difference in your writing. You are more directed, self-assuredHey, thanks!! It's coming up on a year from when I first posted here and you answered!!!!! During that time I found the courage to end my 20 year marriage, started work in a new profession, used your info to get my MD to try Remeron (which allowed me to sleep finally and decreased my anx level), changed to a new therapist you recommended (who is GREAT!!!) and switched MD's (first appt with new psyc doc is Sept)--I also moved to my own place. It's good for me to look at this. The therapist has me keeping a journal of the positive events and personal attributes. It is hard for me but I am working at it! I wanted to thank you for all your help. I'm sure I asked a thousand bothersome questions. Last Aug I was at a low point and not sleeping, even with the klonopin. I am in a much better place now in many ways!!! I look forward to the therapy sessions even though it is hard work--I finally feel that I am chugging up the hill (like the Little Engine that Could--here I date myself!!) I am struggling with the prospect of separation anx--when the therapist leaves. She wants to transition me in Sept, although she will be around until Dec. She will be back and forth from out west where her family has relocated--because she is teaching at the U of NH for the Fall sememster. I want to clutch onto her and keep her here--but of course I can't. I don't think I can find another perfect match like this. What ever you did to find her, it was like a gift to me.
The EMDR does kick up a lot of "stuff". I do get a little nervous still when I know there will be a session. I always have the feeling that something terrible I have not looked at in a long time will come up again--or on the other end that I will go blank. It surprises me that I can let go of control in order to do EMDR. One time about 20 years ago, an MD I went to when I was crazy with PPD tried to teach me self-hypnosis in one 15 min session. I tried to follow all the directions but nothing happened. I sort of thought the same thing would happen with EMDR, but I launched right into it. I am so thoroughly visual that I can bring up pictures that are so sharp.
Last time I asked the therapist what kinds of things she writes down about me. She is great. She read one sessions note from when I first came. It described me as an observation but then gave a very clear and insightful picture of our session. Then I asked what the records from the Mental Health Center were like. She read 2 to me. They mostly had a few sentences of facts i.e. "patient is going to mediation for divorce, complains of continuing difficulties with sleep, continues on klonopin .25, continues to see therapist." I am glad I decided to change.
In Sept I will see the new psy doc (Dr. George Hilton). I will ask him to review medication and side effects (e.g. weight gain, and fluid retention with edema in legs and ankles etc.) and to assess whether I should stay on Remeron [one year in end of Sept]. I would also be curious to see thyroid tests again. Remember I had them done and posted results-which were all right at the bottom of the "normal" range? I have not had any blood tests of any kind in 2 years. If I am 54,and on a tiny dose of hormone replacement and Remeron, what tests would you recommend? I also should make an appt with a regular MD for check up.
Any suggestions of other things I should ask about with the new psy doc?
>>>>People who have strong resources most of their lives and then get a big trauma, may have a very difficult time recovering if they decide that every truism they ever knew is wrong as a result of this bad thing that has happened to them. if they go into therapy, EMDR or otherwise, and begin to utilize their strengths again and allow themselves to see the paradoxes of life, that good exists side by side with bad, black with white, etc, then they can crawl out of the pit they are in and stand on top again. But, although the pit felt really deep to them, reltvely speaking they weren't all that deep, they hd just never been in the pit before so they didn't know how to judge its depth. Now, a person who has been trampled on since childhood and who doesn't have much in the way of positive resources is in the pit too, but much lower down and then life comes along and throws in some rocks on their head just for good measure. So the person begins to duck and then finally never raises their head at all to avoid the rocks. So they never know how deep the pit is or how to get out of it. When they go into therapy, they too can get out of the pit, but it takes longer because they have farther to go and more rocks to dodge. Plus they need to acquire some positive resources in order to complete the journey (like you would need food and water and warmth and possibly a companion to complete a real journey).
Because I am so visual, the metaphors are great!! I do the same thing when I try to explain things to people. This one is great!
>>>That is the basis for doing the Positive EMDR sessions. These help you access good parts of you, remember positive influences from your life, and provide something to fill the hole left by the bad stuff that has resolved.Next EMDR session is first Thurs in Aug since therapist is gone next week. I will see how positive session goes!!
QUESTION: there have been a number of postings on SAM-e here. I also read some of the new book out on it, done by some respected people. It is expensive, but Wal Mart has it for $19 for 20. The authors who treat people with it all the time stated that they use it frequently to augment other AD's --they recommend 400mg daily and say it rarely has side effects. Have you any experience with it or any wisdom on the subject? I was wondering if it might help me?
Guess what? I planted a garden (12x12ft) at this apartment and I have green beans, snowpeas, scallions, cherry tomatoes, dill, parsley, lettuce and already a green pepper, eggplant and some cukes!!!!! I am now glad I forced myself to do it!
Keep checking in. Thanks
Dotty
> Take care.
>
poster:DL
thread:8171
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19990829/msgs/9183.html