Posted by Janice on May 18, 2000, at 10:37:12
In reply to Re: Where in the world is Janice Sandiego?, posted by Greg on May 18, 2000, at 9:50:05
Hello Noa, Dove, Cam, Greg and everyone,
I've been mostly lurking lately, and practising and strengthening my impulse control by not replying to posts. I was afraid of inciting more anger, and as all of my opinions were expressed by various people, I didn't see the need of posting and potentially exciting things more. I like psychobabble as a place to learn, help and interact with other people.I do plan to read the threads more thoroughly before posting.
I am like so good… that I can barely believe how good I am. I don't know if any of you remember about 2 months back I was having troubles with the Pdoc I was seeing--he took me off Dexedrine, which I had been on so successful for an entire year. I've just started with a new pdoc who I like very much. As I suspected, that old pdoc was slanting the truth around to fit his own particular beliefs. This new Pdoc has me back on Dexedrine regularly, and most importantly, I'm being productive again. I can do everything in my life without the Dexedrine except for things I don't want to do (I find that weird, I can't do what I don't want to do!)--look for a job, cook, grocery shop.If I hadn't been hanging around psychobabble during the time of old pdoc, I probably would have just accepted what he had to say as the truth. thanks psychobabble.
Now as for my moods, I really think the rapid cycling and all the other cycles are, if not gone, almost gone. I cannot really put into words the incredible relief I feel, it's nothing short of a miracle for me. Not only has the cycling almost stopped but many, many things seem different. The movement of time, the speed of the world, and the speed of my brain have all slowed down and rearranged and readjusted themselves inside my brain. For the first time since puberty, I feel okay in my skin, I can relax, the unrelenting anger, anguish and pain are gone. It's all feels completely bizarre and foreign and wonderful and fantastic. And to think all my brain needed this whole time, was a little bit of salt! 1200mg of lithium to be exact!Just this week I got a job working in design for 2 1/2 days a week, I like the part-time as a way to ease back into the workforce again. Right now, I'm living with my brother who supports me, as I've only been able to hold down a job for about 50% of my adult life.
Ha, I just realized, this is the first time in my adult life that I've been able to respond to 'how are you' honestly and happily. Anyway, of course, I'll still be hanging out at psychobabble, but if I am not as active at psychobabble as I was it's because I'm out-there trying to find myself a life. I have always learnt alot here and enjoy it, as I'm sure you all know.
Thanks again for your concern, Janice
ps Cam, some of your posting are pretty funny lately. I especially liked your couch potato versus couch slug theory.
poster:Janice
thread:33772
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000517/msgs/33887.html