Posted by medlib on May 31, 2000, at 17:36:18
In reply to How to cope with a sudden low, posted by Louisa on May 31, 2000, at 14:03:18
Louisa--
Extreme rejection sensitivity is a common symptom of depression, particularly the atypical version.
So, #1--Your reaction may be more about how sudden, unexpected disappointment interacts with your disease than about what triggered this response--your dissertation. It helps a bit to recognize this as a repeating personal pattern you can anticipate, for which you need to develop coping strategies--sort of like severe stage fright or extreme exam anxiety. All are ego-evaluation crises. A therapist or self-help book may be of some assistance here.
Once you can put a little distance btw. your emotional reaction and your academic problem, it is easier to bring problem-solving skills to bear. On to #2-- Recognize that you have become a contestant in a time-honored academic war game for which you don't know the rules; learn how to "play the game."
--Be aware that you're applying for admission to an exclusive group--expect to be hazed before being accepted. Be prepared to react with equanimity to the completely absurd, the utterly irrelevant, and the absurdly impossible.
--Realize that the true nature of your assignment is to compose a treatise on your chosen topic exactly like your advisor would write it if s/he were doing it. It is helpful, therefore, to obtain copies of his/her thesis and most recent publications. The subject is irrelevant. You are looking for stylistic approaches, order of presentations--in short, a template you can plug into.
--Accept that this is an endurance contest. The ONLY aptitude you need to succeed is persistence. Therefore, cultivate a plug-it-in-and-grind-it-out attitude; harness it to dogged determination and strip it of every last vestige of individuality or ego involvement.
--Know that your first chapter is *supposed* to be shredded to pieces--everyone's is; that's your advisor's job. This is academic boot camp--the individual *must* be destroyed before a good "soldier" can be built. Your only goal should be to put one foot (word) after another until you cross the finish line.
--Do not be deterred if, when you have crafted a product that satisfies your advisor, another member of your committee objects to your approach and demands revisions which contradict your advisor's demands. Expect to have to broker a compromise, but remember who's commander of this squad.
--Rent a storage locker for your temper and your sanity; stow both for the duration. You might as well get one big enough to hold reason, logic, talent, and relevance. You won't need them for this undertaking.
--You have "won" the game when you have produced a product that reflects well on your advisor. You may then use that advisor as a principle professional reference.
--Remember that your advisor has a vested interest in your completion (after a suitably tortured Inquisition, of course); after a certain amount of time, s/he will be willing to pass on anything finished which doesn't completely embarrass him/her.Well, that's more than enough of that. I could blather on with several more pages of cynical technicalities, but I trust you've gotten the drift by now--the whole process has nothing whatever to do with you as a person. It's about playing the role of a tough, relentless, but loyal, soldier for 3 months; time to don your bullet-proof vest.
Try to find a buddy in Purgatory--some one to bitch with and co-critique. Schedule regular humor breaks and set aside at least half-a-day per week to reconnect with the real world. It and you will still be there when this ordeal is over.
Well wishes---medlib
poster:medlib
thread:35390
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000526/msgs/35422.html