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Re: dopamine and crying » niss

Posted by Paige on May 20, 2001, at 19:43:52

In reply to Re: dopamine and crying...CAM maybe?, posted by niss on May 20, 2001, at 14:10:39

Hi Anissa,

thank you for such a thoughtful email. I agree with all
that you have mentioned. The key one for me is to
be amongst people, but I need people I can trust.
So yes I have alot of issues, mostly familial, but
with a thick icing of pain and I get hurt easily and
the crying really never has stopped its intensity
for the last 4 years. I have a lot of hurt, that
is the bottom line.

I go to therapy right now 2x a month for 2hr visits
when I can afford it. I see the shrink here and
there (although I think he could help more) for
meds, but I wish he would be a bit more human and
talk like I am a person versus a molecule.

I exercise mucho ( workout in the a.m. for 1 .5 hours)
and I work outdoors, get all that sun and am a quasi-
vegetarian to boot. I barely have a cocktail, and
I have no other vice except for it appears, as of late,
my pain. So I do all the right things and I am still
a wreck.

My dad was very depressed. My mother denies she ever
was or could be. Father was an alcoholic..the rest
is easy to figure out. SO, some genetics, some
enviro.

I just feel very sad, very lonely most if not 98%
of the time and this contributes bigttime to
my demise, I know this for sure.

Well, then you got an earful....sorry about that. But
I couldn't contain myself.

Ya' know I volunteer for 4 hrs a week on an organic
farm with the developmentally challenged/disabled
(I don't know p.c. word) and this one woman said to me
the other day (a resident who lived in London for
12 years before her parents sent her away to this place)
"don't get your knickers in a twist." I just about fell
into the compost bin. This is ultimately what
I am trying to not to do, is get my knickers in a twist.
I will add she said this when she saw me correcting some
of her work because she can already tell I have a
set of problems! I am compulsive, things need to be'as perfect
as one can get them, especially plants if they are going to live!

Thanks for your help. Keep in touch.

Paige...no tears today, not yet.


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poster:Paige thread:63517
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010515/msgs/63744.html