Posted by Jjoe on May 30, 2001, at 8:54:50
I have been suffering from major depression for the past 9 months following my first and only 'manic' episode, which led to me being diagnosed as Bipolar 1.
I was started on lithium and then added Zoloft to try to combat the depression. I ceased the lithium after about 2 months due to 'D.T.'s side effects and weight gain. Also it had had no effect on me. I continued the Zoloft 100mg per day for another 3 weeks, to total 8 weeks. Depression was not relieved at all so I stopped the Zoloft as well.
Other A.D.'s I've tried include Effexor, Moclobemide and recently Luvox, all which did nothing to reduce the depression, however they did not induce mania even though I wasn't taking a mood stabiliser.The only temporary relief I have had from this depression has been from Valium at doses 20mg and higher and from illegaly obtained dex-amphetamines 20mg and higher, up to 50 mg over 24 hours, the latter which pretty much relieved most depressive symptoms but had an unwelcome come down, with higher than normal anxiety.
My depressive symptoms include lack of energy & motivation, fatigue, chronic insomnia and early morning and night wakening, loss of interest in preciously enjoyable activities. The worst 'symptom' is a disabilty to engage and/or maintain a normal conversation, long periods of uncomfortable silence, especially among strangers but even with people I work with, inluding my boss. This inability to communicate effectively is very frustrating, I simply find it hard to talk to people. I also have a constantly running internal dialouge which I can't shut off which the main topic is 'Whats wrong with me, what do I need to feel better, will I ever feel better, I haven't always been this way so what happened to make it like this. This dominated 90% of my thoughts, and therefore I suffer poor concentration, in-attentiveness and apathy.
What I am hoping is that some of you very knowledgeable people can offer some advice or can relate to what I am going through. Also I wonder if
a) Will continued use off A.D.'s increase the chance of rapid cycling/mixed states (do I already suffer from this??
b) What other A.D.'s besides S.S.R.I's might be helpfull, Wellbutrin? Remeron?
c) What is the best mood stabiliser besides Lithium, that doesn't promote weight gain.
d) Does the absence of mania with S.S.R.I. and dex-amphetamine use, without a mood stabiliser indicate I may not be Bipolar?Plese note that I live in rural Australia and I don't know which drugs are available here. I only have access to a G.P. at the moment, no Pdoc.
Also in the past I have suffered chronic marijuana addiction and this may be a factor as to the cause of the depression. I haven't smoked dope chronically for about 10 months and now only rarely as it has lost its 'theraputic' effects for me. One Psychiatrist diagnosed me with cannabis induced mood disorder, whatever that is, before I was Bipolarised...
Any response would be greatly appreciated...
Joe
poster:Jjoe
thread:64720
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010530/msgs/64720.html