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Re: benzos as a necessary good » gilbert

Posted by Zo on March 9, 2002, at 19:01:09

In reply to Re: benzodiazEpines, posted by gilbert on March 9, 2002, at 17:19:11


. . .And then there's boring types like me who cannot get addicted to save their lives (sorry, just my mordant humor.) Who have been plugging along on various benzos since 1985 and never had to increase any. Some just plumb didn't work, but that's another, possibly related story. The serious point being, why is it so different for some; how could someone in my lifelong chemical desperation not have become addicted to anything, even when I needed it, if you understand. When the pain and suicidality was unbearable---I have siblings, just as ill and with the same wretched parents and wretched genes, who did self-medicate, and who became addicts. I couldn't find even that kind of relief, then--and it wasn't long ago that meds were few and choices almost nil--and in fact my chemical imbalance has proved far more stubborn than theirs, in our various recoveries.

I haven't medical theories. I know I will likely, barring medical breakthough, need benzos to fall asleep for the rest of my life--and thank god for that. You see my point? I do have great compassion for both sides of the coin, and think there's some kind of cautionary in my tale. . .sorry, too muddled today to think further. . .

Zo


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