Posted by BarbaraCat on March 18, 2002, at 17:33:03
In reply to Re: Another trial. Topamax? Help. » BarbaraCat, posted by Janelle on March 18, 2002, at 17:05:02
Thanks so Much, Janelle. Misery sometimes needs company and feels terribly isolated, even with a good husband who wishes he could help. Yeah, I wish I did get some of those juicy hypomanic stages. Maybe I'd get some things done that have been on the shelf the last few years. We sound similar, cycling from depression to anxiety, from blob to blip. I don't work right now. I was a systems analyst and used to have a pretty good brain, even though I've suffered from this shit most of my life. At least I could maintain. It's only been in the last year since I've come down with fibromyalgia symptoms that I really can't work anymore. That causes quite a strain on the finances. I'm waiting to hear about Social Security but in the meantime. . . I also used to be quite physically active with yoga, dance and giving lessons, hiking. Not always, since I'd go through a downslide a few times a year, but at least I could schedule my life, take classes, plan on going to an event, whatever. Now I'm mainly in pain and depressed with a few sunshine breaks now and then. Medicine will work for a while and what a teaser! But then I'll feel the same old dull foggy sludge creeping back with miserable anxiety mixed in.
I've been getting my lithium levels checked, but they're still low cause I've been on it for only 4 weeks. I've increased, but have felt no change yet. I'm going to suggest Lamictil and perhaps Topamax to my doc. Intuitively it feels like I need an SSRI plus a mood stabilizer cause I don't do squat on SSRI's alone. You know, I must admit that my life situation has alot to do with things. I'm very worried about my finances, surviving, being a bag lady. That might just be the depression talking, but I bet getting a call from the Lottery folks would perk me up for at least a few months. Please keep me informed of your progress, how the Lamactil is working for you, or anything else to report. - Barbara
> Barbara,
>
> You are describing much of what I am also going through (misery loves company?!!) I am also SOOOO sick of this. I'm sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.
>
> I am the SAME way as you - I'll feel better for a few weeks, get my hopes up, only to crash again. I've been told that this is a form of cycling, although I never feel high (not like hypomania and definitely NOT mania). I seem to cycle between feeling good and feeling depressed (and anxious). Like I'm on a roller coaster (and I wanna get off!)
>
> Like you so well described, I also "blob around" (more like I'm dragging butt)and particularly disturbing is that I've gone from being a very alert, organized person to being absent minded, forgetful and my memory is shot. I'm also tired, anxious, depressed and discouraged about life.
>
> You mentioned that you are a dancer and yoga instructor -- when you get depressed are you able to work? I'm not.
>
> My brew has some things in common with yours and I have a question for you about the Lithium - do you get your blood levels monitored regularly?
>
> I was going to do Lithium but got concerned about having to monitor the blood levels, etc., plus my pdoc said there are newer meds (like Lamictal) to use as mood stablizers with fewer side effects, so that's what I've just begun to titrate up on.
>
> I'm sorry I don't have any suggestions for you and that all I did was ask you a few questions which I hope you'll answer here. I wanted to let you know that you are not alone, and that someone (ME!) is feeling A LOT OF THE EXACT SAME things you are.
> -Janelle
poster:BarbaraCat
thread:98599
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20020318/msgs/98629.html