Posted by srf on January 22, 2003, at 14:16:58
In reply to Re: I'm feeling much better on Effexor!, posted by M. Lee on January 19, 2003, at 13:39:22
I thought I'd add to the positive messages re this med. I've had progressively worsening bouts with depression for 30 years. Sporadic treatment for several years, then dropping out when I felt better. First treatment in my early 20s by psycho-babbling therapist. No real help. Low dose of Elavil (I'm very sensitive to drugs and can easily overdose) provided by my GP in my late 20s was the first success. Took it for 4 years and felt okay (not great, but okay) for the next 10. Then crashed and fell in the pit. Tried Zoloft with miserable insomnia. Quit. Back to Elavil - very low dose again and it helped me enough to get me into therapy. Therapy did wonders for me, but I could still see the pit and always felt like I was standing on the edge of it. I was pushing to decrease the Elavil even more due to severe grogginess in the am, but my GP insisted I try 37.5 mg of Effexor in the am + 25 mg Elavil in the pm. The nausea was so miserable the first few days that I reduced Effexor to 1/2 a tab thinking that I could increase it when tolerance built up. But all of a sudden the pit went away. I'm able to apply what I learned in therapy, anger is manageable, tears are rare and short-lived, negative monologues are controllable. Meanwhile I was able to reduce the Elavil to 1/2 and am feeling better emotionally than I've ever felt in my life. I still have a touch of nausea in the morning, but that's the only side effect I notice. I may be one of the lucky ones due to my drug sensitivity (which extends to decongestants, codeine, sedatives, antihistamines, and general anesthesia).
But the thing I really want to share is that there are two lessons I've learned.
1. Expect to mess with dosages and combinations. Expect to go through several doctors. Don't give up entirely. Don't trust your gut feelings because our depression biases those feelings. Keep at it until you have a doctor you can trust and then follow up with your own research. Use your head, not your emotions!!
2. VERY IMPORTANT Therapy. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Learn to shut up the devil in your head and listen to the angel (I called her Pollyanna). The devil thinks you're a failure, the angel has faith in you. No amount of medication can banish the pit when you don't know emotionally how to live without it. It feels cheesy to share this, but I worked hard to internalize a couple of statements from a set of affirmation cards a friend gave me. ("I have faith in an unseen future" helps me most with generic worrying)I don't know when I'll stop taking it. Someday, when I'm confident that Pollyanna won't weaken without it.
My heart goes out to you. It's a long, lonely struggle. And it gets so dark. But as someone else here said, we're survivors. So here's to survival by any means necessary.
poster:srf
thread:13781
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030119/msgs/137065.html