Posted by Ritch on February 13, 2003, at 13:56:08
In reply to Re: Ritch:Juggling Meds and Frustrating life » Ritch, posted by jumpy on February 13, 2003, at 11:36:29
> > It does seem like the quest for the perfect med combo, huh? :) Fortunately, my moods shift in predictable ways (they are seasonal), and I cycle very predictably throughout all of that as well. I always chart stuff as best as possible. All of this *objectifies* the "illness" and makes it a lot easier to handle. I've been having these problems for almost 30 years so I am not having to deal with the "being diagnosed as X" kind of thing. Also when you see the illness as a process that you have limited control over-you self-pity a lot less because you don't sweat every decision you make or wish you had done something differently, etc. The good thing is that more good stuff is *always* going to happen again. When you really *feel* that *certainty* it makes getting through black times a lot easier. You have to remember that your memory is mood-state dependent. When you feel crumby, you have great difficulty remembering anything good in the past. But, you can always remind yourself of that knowledge and it helps you to persevere. Humor helps a LOT. When you get depressed go out of your way to try to watch or listen to something funny and get lost in it. It can make a big difference. I find also that when I am high I get more stable by doing things in a more scheduled (rather than haphazard) manner. If I am depressed I find it helps to force myself to do something different (expose yourself to a novel situation or alternative way of doing something). Hope this helps some.
>
> Hey Ritch/Mitch,
>
> Thanks a million ... I am going to print this out and post it on the refrigerator. I guess the hardest part is accepting that I am handicapped. That because of my anxiety and depression or the side effects of treatment, I will
>
> 1. Never marry or have a loving, stable relationship
> 2. Never have children
> 3. Grow old alone
> 4. Never advance at work
> 5. Will develope multiple medical problems from the side effects of nardil like high blood pressure and diabetes for which I will need more medications
> 6. Never have a solid group of friends or support system
>
> I guess I have to face that reality someday and just accept my handcapp. Accept my life will be just 30 more years of reading psychobabble and pubmed looking for something to help and watching television alone ... while everyone else is out with there families and friends and enjoying life.
>
> Thanks again!
>
> Jumpy
>
> Thanks for all the advise.
>
> Jumpy
>Jumpy, I think you are doing some of that "fortune telling" stuff that CBT tries to address. When you start using "should" and "never" and "always" in your self-assessments you are painting yourself in a corner that doesn't exist. I'm just now starting to get involved with some CBT and *trying* to put the med hassles on the backburner. My biggest troubles are overgeneralization and catastrophic thinking. Of course, for now I welcome the challenges of managing to not get too high! It took me three tries at college to make it through and get a reasonably decent job. You are going to do OK. I wished the treatments that are available now were available when I was 19.
poster:Ritch
thread:140790
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030208/msgs/200132.html