Posted by babak on February 28, 2003, at 6:19:41
In reply to I Crashed From The Past, posted by TommyTommy on February 27, 2003, at 23:39:07
I really feel for you and I think a lot of us here can relate to your story.
My own illness started gradually at 16 but it became beyond control at 26. It took over 18 months of trying different drugs to get it under control. However every six or seven years it takes another turn for the worse. I am now 44 and just had ECT which has made things even worse. All I can tell you it that your situation is not unusual.Have you tried therapy? I am not saying that therapy is a cure, nowhere near it and I certainly don’t subscribe to the idea that most mental health problems have psychological root. But therapy is a kind of exercise like physical exercise which helps you to kip fit to a certain extent thereby lightening the burden of mental anguish. In total I have had 10 years of various therapies. I think therapy is like mental gymnastic. It helps your mind to remain flexible. It also helps to keep the torment in your mind separated from your actions which could become self destructive or hurt others around you.
Other than that and more importantly; don’t settle for partial remission that some drugs offer. Keep trying different ones. My biggest mistake has been accepting a partial remission offered by Prozac initially and then Effexor. When I first took Prozac I was in such from cataclysmic state of anxiety and panic that I was just so grateful for saving me from constant thoughts of suicide that I didn’t care if was still depressed and withdrawn. So I spent the next six years resigned to at least being alive and capable of working like a robot, until one day I woke up and asked myself what was the point of living like this. After that I tried a few other drugs and off course the nightmare came back until I came across Effexor which was a little better than Prozac. Then I went on for another eight years but meanwhile I totally lost my libido and was gripped by an ever increasing anhedonia. Because of it my marriage broke down and I went bankrupt. So I went back to the doctors and tried the combination of Mirtazapine and Effexor. Within ten days my depression was in full remission and for the first time in fourteen years I felt really happy. Unfortunately the effects faded away over a ten week period. That was when I tried ECT which has made me feel worse.
My psychiatrist told me that there was nothing else to try so I change my doctor and we are now planning a new strategy to try a lot of other medications that I haven’t tried yet. After all these years I am still hopeful simply because I can’t afford not to be.
So keep going and be patient because like me you don’t have a choice. One word of advice: Try to change from Effexor to something else, because a lot of people find it impossible to come of Effexor and that could limit your choices later on.
Good Luck
poster:babak
thread:204546
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030224/msgs/204588.html