Posted by tricksaturnsc2 on November 24, 2003, at 20:10:16
In reply to Re: Serzone and MDMA, posted by MrZest on December 10, 1998, at 8:32:46
It's funny the person that said I have bipolar type 2 & i've been able to cover it up until the past few years. They don't seem to realize that bipolar doesn't start until the early 20s (you might be depressed before then, & irritable, but that is not mania. A mixed state is not a manic state, cyclothymia & dysthymia are not bipolar).
I didn't take any drugs until I was 18, never planned to. Had depression since I was 14, developed bipolar around 19 (despite getting violent at 16), that's bipolar I which is more serious BTW.
Been 9 months drug free, never felt better. Lots of drugs kill your serotonin receptors, screwing you permanently. I used to be a cough syrup junkie & now I see everything in flashy, shimmery vision w/ perma trails. I've attempted suicide maybe 10 times since I started drugs.
you don't feel better as soon as you stop the drugs, it takes up to a year later. And you'll never be as well off as if you never took them. You'll be more irritable, more depressed, more psychotic, less intelligent.
After my last cough syrup trip, which was a trip to put all other people's to shame - it was pure dxm powder and it was 6000 mg - I thought I had alzheimer's. I was a complete maniac afterwards (I stopped breathing & was catatonic for awhile) but then I got really depressed. I was extremely agitated, I had a fast car & after not driving it for only 2 weeks I was all agitated because it seemed so slow - obviously it was no slower than before, it's just the drugs permanently slowed down everything.
I thought I had alzheimer's my memory was so bad. I would be thinking "who was it that sang jailhouse rock and blue suede shoes" even when I pictured elvis I couldn't remember his name, for example.
Ironically now i'm very sensitive to serzone, at least when I'm on remeron. I take just 50mg serzone & i'm tweaking (other meds:60mg remeron, 1750 depakote, 30mg ambien & 300 seroquel).
What obviously happened is that I changed my receptors since the last huge dxm dose (which was enough to kill anyone else - i seem to be invincible) because before I used to be on 500 mg of serzone a day while being on depakote & all the things I'm on now.
someone said neuroleptics are neurotoxic - actually quite the opposite is true. Patients that have taken neuroleptics for a long time, when you look at their brain's when they're dead, you see an INCREASED density of receptors, the body's way of counteracting the neuroleptics.
After all this rant, what is my point????
Well that drugs do mess you up permanently, reguardless of what people's level of functioning is it will be worse than if they never had taken drugs,& especially - these people that take ecstasy now
& say how great they're doing - I would love to see where these chronic ecstasy users are 50 years from now. Brain damage does not always show itself right away. Alcoholics can drink for years but then you see it finally catch up with them when they're bald, emotionless, depressed, & impotent. And ecstasy is a lot more neurotoxic than alcohol.I'd put it up there with inhalants.
poster:tricksaturnsc2
thread:902
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20031121/msgs/283395.html