Posted by scott-d-o on February 4, 2004, at 19:55:11
In reply to Re: Total Despair, posted by Mr. Scott on February 4, 2004, at 18:47:59
>
> My Depression:
>
> Great fatigue and stiffness. Irritable mood and accusatory frame of mind (what are you really trying to say?). Chronic yet fluctuating anxiety. Feeling that everything is just too stressfull. Frequent communication to others about my despair often with a smile on my face or making a joke about it. Lack of patience of tolerance particularly with those closest. Exceptional hostility. Sadness. Super Pessimistic thinking. Feelings of inadequacy and self doubt. Desire for escape and sleep. Occassional thoughts of suicide but not too often. Mostly a real shitty feeling and a desire to tell everyone and everything to go away so I can sleep. Only mildy affecting work, but definately impairing my ability to have any kind of relationship with my girlfriend.
>
> She is selfish and so am I. I am I guess because of my illness (only so much energy and good mood to go around and i have to work!). I try to be a great boyfriend to her and generally I am, but I feel disrepected, unappreciated, and as if all responsibility falls upon my shoulders. I must change and yet accept her for who she is. I am having a hard to living up to her expectations and well I'm thinking I would feel less stress without her, but obviously more loneliness too.
>
> I have lost perspective as to whether this is mostly my depression or if she is the cause of this exacerbation. Probably both.
>
> Current Med Regimen:
> Trileptal 600mg - 900mg
> Tranxene 7.5mg
> Fish Oil 1 Gram
> 5htp 50mg
> GABA 750mg
>
> Occassional psuedoepedrine or anti depressant use for quick and short lived bursts of energy. The Psuedophed generally leads to a crash.
>
>perhaps you should try going on an antidepressant like an SSRI or even a psychostimulant.. I mean for chronic use, not just occasional. pseudoephedrine doesn't help with anything except nasal decongestion, it's action is too peripheral to be of any use.. 5htp at that low of a dose is also practically useless in my experience.. sounds like you are on too many GABAnergic meds which relieve anxiety but can cause depression in the longterm.. definitely try adding a serotonergic medication first, then if that doesn't work try something more activating like wellbutrin or a stimulant, since it's most likely a dysfunction of the serotonin or dopamine systems.. I doubt she is the cause of your problems; you sound way too pessimistic and should look at the postive aspects--like at least you have a gf and there is someone who cares about you..
scott
poster:scott-d-o
thread:309233
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20040204/msgs/309496.html