Posted by Enigma on January 10, 2005, at 19:47:07
I've had a worsening depression over the years that no medication or other treatment has helped.
I was bipolar, but my hypo-manic days haven't been seen for at least year or more.
My specific problems (at their worst) are:
1) No desire to get out of bed, to be with friends, go out of the house, etc
3) I can't seem to find enjoyment in anything, and hence don't want to do anything - so I'm useless at work, at home, etc. I can't even clean my office (where I spent most of my time).
4) Suicidal thoughts - won't do it, but I think about it, a lot, just as an escape from being depressed all the time
5) Irritibilty with certain people, and mainly when driving
6) Holding down my job had been near impossible - I'm on disability at the momentI've tried many drugs of the years, mostly 2-3 in combination. Wellbutrin, Depakote, Cymbalta, Symbyax, Trileptal, Paxil, Zoloft, Lamictal Effexor, Cyprexa, Lexapro, Prozac, Risperdal, Zyprexa, and about 3 others or more. I have NOT tried any MAOI's, yet.
Risperdal at 1mg (I think) has been 50% effective for my depression, by itself. Mixing it with other meds didn't seem to have any effect, besides having more side effects.
I have gained weight with Risperdal, which, well, on a thin guy like me, sucks big time. Risperdal has also had the opposite effect as prozac when it comes to sex. Instead of taking a very long time to orgasm (or not at all), now it's well, the opposite, and just doesn't feel "right".
Anyway, my short term disability is near complete, and I have to go back to work. Either that or go on long term which only pays 66% of my salary, and I'll face the good chance my job won't be there when I come back.
It is time for MAOI's? These scare the hell outta me. Since my memory is crap, I'd probably forget which things don't mix with MAOI's and take them by accident.
Therapy is useless for me (tried it many times) as I'm "chemically" depressed. I'm just depressed, not about anything in particular. I have nothing I feel I need to talk about, or anything besides my depression that upsets me (well there's other drivers..).
I'm not confident that other other ssri's or other meds are going to have any effect on the depression. Only Risperdal, and possibly Prozac has had any effect. Many, like Effexor and Lexapro had *severe* side effects, especially when trying to taper off them
My doctor doesn't want me to go back on prozac because it was one med in a cocktail that got me a short stay at the hosipital for severe suicidal thoughts.
I'm not sure what else to do.
I'm dreading going back to work, and if I'm going to be able to function there at all (or even get up to and get INTO work for starters).
Please help!
poster:Enigma
thread:440313
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050108/msgs/440313.html