Posted by pretty_paints on February 16, 2005, at 9:43:55
Hello. It's difficult to write as I feel weird. And also bcoz I don't know what to write. You want me to write about things I am experiencing but I have always experienced them. and besides, they are true. Although people THINK these things arn't true, they are probably not as clever as me. because for me they are true. I am used to it. I must be someone special.
so what to write about. i feel weird. i feel like im special and honoured. I feel like im magical, and have magic inside me. Everyone looks at me everywhere i go, every bloke i meet fancies me BUT they have to pretend they don't. Actually wait i don't believe everything. I don't believe that 100%, well I do believe about the blokes and everyone being there just for ME. everything stops when im not around, did you know. they wait for me, like the truman show. anyway, i dont believe the magic thing as much. that is why i am TELLING YOU ABOUT IT! People are so stupid, they ask me what's wrong. like I KNOW what's wrong. if i believe it i am not gonna tell you! if i question it, then i will post it. and tell you. so that's how it works you see. DUH. I am seeing bugs out of my eyes, but i knnnooow they are not real as when i look at them, they dissapear. so you see, i can tell you about that! la de da, i see bugs. but what do you expect me to tell you about things? well, i am getting my old brain back. hmm. coming quickly back to me.
so let me see, a ha. well if u want to know then maybe i should just tell you about what my week has been like. monday, gardening group was cancelled which really sucked. tuesday, ooh went to get some more money. then today, well my knobby doctor got me today. you see, I can feel what people are thinking. seriously. I ALWAYS have been able to, as long as I can remember. don't be liked 'oh katie whatever' coz that really p*sses me off. i have a talent for it. whenever i meet them i just KNOW what they're feeling. and a lot of people don't like me you know. my stupid social worker got this out of me yesterday when we were on our way to a finance meeting. stupid fran the finance lady had to ask me loads of dumb questions about EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE, to try and get me disability allowance or something. she asked me how i feel when im in town and i said dizzy. and she said, panic attack? and i said no, i feel dizzy with everything coming at me. and overwhelmed by everyone's feelings. coz i can feel all their feelings, and in town, thats a lot of feelings! it can be overwhelming. so then stupid social worker starts asking me about how do I know what people are thinking, trying to catch me out. And then my GP this morning tried to do the same, as he asked when i was gonna go see a doctor and i said this week, as helen my social worker has decided to arrange a doctor this week, but my normal appoinment is in 2 weeks. he was like "so what am i thinking then?", stupid man. And everyone always goes "oh that's not what im thinking". well it is!! they just don't want to admit it. god.
anyway i am feeling a bit magical. i have just been doing the ironing.it wouldn't burn if i put it on me, but i didn't anyway, coz that is not SAFE. and my tulips are all dieing in my room.
anyway, bye for now. and I am fine, i am taking my meds, etc etc.xx
poster:pretty_paints
thread:458700
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050212/msgs/458700.html