Posted by crazychickuk on April 30, 2005, at 18:10:51
I am depressed obviousley but i cant cry, i do get panicky over losing my mind other phyiscal symptoms are no bother, i am so paranoid that theres someone watching me all the time, paranoid ppl are out to get me, paranoid someone is following me down my stairs ( i live alone cept my 5yr old) paranoid someone is upstairs, paranoid that what if the tele talks to me, paranoid that i have some kind of a severe mental illness so bad that i will lose my mind, paranoid dead ppl r trying to get into my head, i know none of these are true but cant shift it.
I feel detached unreal (for mnths now) my eyes r blurry as if they aint working proply, as if im losing my bladder control (im not) i have no motivation, laffing is a big task, i feel weak and bad news makes me even weaker i can not handle it.
i can be sat there watching something on tele and it feels as if my brain is switching off, like it shakes then i panick, my eyes goes side to side as if im having a seizure ( maybe i need glasses?)
i havent been on meds sinze stopping zispin sept last yr as they changed the form and i didnt get on with it..
im afraid to go to docs they might put me in hospital and they will give me more meds that just dont agree with me at all, i have never been able to get on with any. i see a private physcologist who says its severe anxiety? what about physcotic depression?
anyone understand what im talking about? anyone know the answer?
i cant touch or feel what i should love !! i shouldnt be here i cant even cry ffs!! feels like im losing my sanity :-(
poster:crazychickuk
thread:492022
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050428/msgs/492022.html