Posted by friendobillnbob on November 13, 2006, at 7:31:40
In reply to Re: Social Anxiety, Klonopin, Lyrica, posted by Crazy Horse on November 11, 2006, at 18:29:15
> > I don't touch alcohol.... I've had problems with it in the past and go to AA meetings 2x a week.
> >
> > Oddly, I don't see how klonopin can be "fun" and I've never had the urge to take it recreationally. They say alcoholics can't use benzos correctly but I guess I'm the exception...
>
> Me too erik. I just recently celebrated two years of alcohol sobriety. I have no cravings/urges to abuse Klonopin at all. Congrats on your decision to abstain from alcohol. Since i have stopped drinking my depression is definitely not as severe and for the past 3 mos. pretty much non-existent. :)
>
> -Monte
>Hello;
My first time posting - I was greatly impressed with this thread, and Monte & Erik's posts as it speaks directly with my situation.
I've been sober and active in AA 20+ years now. In the beginning I was quite a hardliner and fearful of any medication, following the anti-medication line of thinking in the group where I got sober. This has changed quite a bit over the years - and I've been agonizing over a recent decision to start Clonazepam & Pregabalin for Social Phobia, tremors and involuntary limb movements while asleep.
I believe the tremors (essential tremor) which I experienced before ever picking up a drink, contributed to my Social Anxiety - and at age 14,
when I discovered that Alcohol seemed to be a perfect cure for both conditions, I became an instant alcoholic. AA re-introduced me to life on the planet after 10 years of progressively insane drinking, and helped me to break a lifelong phobia of public speaking, sober. While some gains were made in the area of my social phobia, AA of course did nothing for my tremor. It's happened more than once where in AA my tremor has been misinterpreted for coming off a drunk - and the tremor has gotten worse over the last few years (I'm 47 now). Worse, the tremor has got in my voice so that often if I do get nervous or excited it seems to me that others perceive me as if I am on the verge of cracking up - and react to it with facial expressions that convey either dismay or sympathy. Now this all has greatly contributed to an increase of my Social Phobia which has made my life really difficult lately. Things I could do rather easily before (presentations, dealing with people directly on difficult subjects) are much harder than before. I've had a few times over the last few years when i've felt close to losing my mind, and have sought relief in periodic usage of a few different kinds of Benzos. I haven't felt any inclination to abuse them and I've been careful to only use a small amount on an as-needed basis - but I'm afraid of my mind's ability to rationalise and escalate the dosaage, and have not shared about my Benzo use at meetings (only with a couple of members who I trust).On one hand my mind tells me I am totally crazy to be experimenting with these drugs - that I am putting my sobriety in deep peril for doing so - and especially guilty for not sharing this openly in AA ('we're only as sick as our secrets')
On the other hand I see my social anxiety is destroying my ability to hold my life together and affecting my work, family and even AA life (as I'm even finding it difficult to interact with other AAs recently). I need help and part of that might be in medication. (the big book also says to never discount the services of a good doctor or psychiatrist) I'm in the 'peak' of career and family obligations and I've got others who are depending on me to hold it together.
Anyhow I hope the Pregabalin will work as I prefer that to the Benzo profile, my first reaction to it was quite positive, and it seemed to help with my tremors if it continues to work it will be killing several birds with one stone.
God bless you all - and I hope that you all find the answers you need, giving you happiness and good health.
poster:friendobillnbob
thread:702204
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20061110/msgs/703063.html