Posted by yxibow on August 7, 2008, at 0:47:51
In reply to Confusion flusters me.....i've been in this cycle, posted by rjlockhart '05 on August 5, 2008, at 22:57:47
> The only escape truly what i do, is accepting pain. all my contacts have been lost. My friends, all my freinds left, there getting married, dating, ask me why the hell are callin me dude?
>
> has something psycholocially happened? to where i view reality diffrent.
>
> All, i had contact's here. I know your still here Phillipa, but what happened? these years of nothing....why did this happen?
>
> It's year's, i've read. I dont know who i am, i dont even rerember old posts i wrote. seem like someone else? the validity, i'm so mixed with confusion. No one, understands.....if i got on youtube.com, made myself a channel.
>
> I'm going to finish this on the psychology board.
>
> -unknown.
Don't leave us -- you contributed a lot to this board and we learned about your life.
What you're experiencing is an emotional reaction to rejection from your friends -- and I can understand this.I am still in one place, trapped in a disorder I never asked for, for 7 years. I should be with a partner and the picket fence or the condo, but I'm not. I'm still at home, and I'm not there because I want to live in my parent's basement so to speak. I still have trauma to solve so I can exist on my own.
Your friends have moved on in their lives, and unfortunately don't understand that mental (biological) illness is a frustrating and hard condition to work with and requires extra work than the average person to get to where you want.
I can't tell you what to do, because I face a dilemma too -- I mean, I still am in a sort of acquaintance contact with my friends that I built up for 15 years, but while some of them understand that I have things to deal with, they have moved on, literally most of them have moved further south and they have their own busy lives.
Its hard finding new friends but there are outlets, craigslist, your local NAMI chapter, absolutely any hobby that you enjoy that has a group, anything to connect again to society.
Yes, something psychologically has happened -- but as to debating the nature of the universe, so to speak, your reality is yours.We all have our own realities in this thing called life, a temporary existence which should be used and enjoyed to the extent that you can.
My confusion is different -- it is a part of my complex of complexes; if I get too much anxiety, I tend to decompensate (a state of lesser functionality, a technical term in psychiatry) and can enter a psychosis, but that also is a fairly loaded term -- its not like I'm running mad -- its just a wierd sensation of knowing where I am since I have lived here my life, but feeling so disconnected.
I can't say what your confusion is, but the one thing I can say in all things psychological is not to concentrate on symptoms, but to concentrate on things that are life affirming, life building, and will put you on a path to a success you want. But you have to find a purpose. That's a hard assignment and perhaps a metaphysical concept but it shows what drives you.
-- best wishesJay
poster:yxibow
thread:844463
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20080805/msgs/844736.html