Posted by ralphrost2 on March 28, 2009, at 15:42:51
Hello,
I just wanted to leave you some thoughts about my experience while recovering from depression. Depression completely devastated my life for about 6 years, and I'm sure you know what it's like.
For a long time I had a very high hope on drugs. Thought that antidepressants would make miracles to me. Unfortunately I never had a very robust response from them. Nevertheless I kept using a small dose of Citalopram (20 mg) the whole time. My belief is that small doses (specially when it comes to SSRIs) are best. Side effects increase more than benefits at higher doses (that was my experience, at least).
Just wanted to emphasize that when I started to admit that I would have a hard time ahead recovering and that I would have to be really corageous and rely on my own strenght (despite I totally believed I had none), things started to change. Merely because I had accepted the difficulty and quit looking for some easy way out. This was the most difficult part of all. But I learned that getting cured (and I mean cured) from depression takes a lot of time and effort. We always wish to feel great the day after (depression hurts too much), but I had to accept that I would improve step by step. And I would have to learn to celebrate each small improvement step. Just like a handicapped starting to rehab. Harsh, I know.
I personally believe that one shouldn't be so hopeful on drugs. They do help, but what I think it's most important is to find an internal solution. Our mind is way more powerful than anything. I'm wrinting this not because I want to teach people anything or sound like a guru. I'm writing it because this was the most difficult thing that I had to work on. And it turned out to be fundamental for recovery, as I look back and think of everything I've been through.
I can't stress enough how much I believe that physical exercises are an important part of the recovery. It's hard to start, but it's miraculous. Unlike antidepressants, exercises have a very deep and holistic quality to recovery. It's very sinergistic with antidepressants and touches you more widely than anything. I found that weight lifting was particularly helpful.
Another thing I would say is that I believe that focus on something that is important to you is very helpful too. Get strongly involved with something that won't hurt you. Celebrate small accomplishments on what you got, even if you know it is small and may look insignificant. We LEARN to be more positive when we celebrate small things. It is hard to think of celebrating anything when we are depressed. But it's a learning thing.
One beautiful day you will notice: "Hey, I feel better. There is something different with me. I feel that some things of my old self are slowly returning". I'm sure this wonderful day will come.
I hope that the things I wrote are helpful in some way, and that they don't hurt anybody. I'm sorry if it was repetitive or if it bothered you.
Best wishes
Ralph
poster:ralphrost2
thread:887421
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20090322/msgs/887421.html