Posted by sukarno on July 1, 2010, at 18:54:29
I was having to use my light box 3 to 4 hours per day just to feel normal for a day, whereas in the past I could use just it for 1 or 2 hours and would be fine.
I quit Stablon on 28 April 2010 and Xanax around the same time. I went back to Valium and used light therapy, but the depression was becoming serious as was my mood (feeling like there was no way out of my situation).
I decided to give Xanax another try even though I know it lowers libido, increases appetite and has horrific withdrawal symptoms if you quit abruptly, unlike Valium.
I have been on 1mg alprazolam for 3 or 4 days and have not used my light box. My depression has not returned, even with the curtains closed (hence, dark).
This is very unusual. Usually my depression will hit hard if I skip one day of light therapy and I'll be crying and very emotional (full of frustration).
I am in a stressful situation.
However, I have noticed that the depression is in full remission as if I had taken an SSRI or something. This happened before in 2008 when I tried Xanax and the depression stayed away for 3 months. Depression returned only after moving to this house (which is very dark compared to my previous house).
I can only conclude that Xanax has an antidepressant effect. This is backed up by a psychiatrist in the US saying the same (but only in high doses and he wouldn't prescribe those doses) and a study in Japan in 2007 where they used Xanax as monotherapy in the treatment of Major Depressive Disorder. The majority responded and depression went into remission.
From what I've gathered, Xanax causes 5-HT (serotonin) release and also the release of noradrenaline. It also has another mode of action, but I can't remember off the top of my head what it was.
There is a possibility that Valium simply induces or exacerbates depression in its own right. I know that I feel depressed after taking Valium and with long term use (20 years) the depression seemed to be getting worse.
I noticed that I am much more patient now and my adverse situation no longer seems adverse anymore. Strange. I don't fly off the handle over small or big things anymore. I'm more rational. I feel like I've taken a mood stabilizer for the past few days.
I was to the point of considering using cannabis as an antidepressant despite serious legal consequences in the country where I reside.
Now that Xanax does the job (and as long as it keeps doing so), I'll just stick with that.
I know it will increase my appetite (already has), lower libido (probably due to 5-HT and NA release) and cause stronger physical dependence, but I feel the benefits are worth the risks.
Monotherapy on Xanax without light therapy and feeling happy... playing with my son a lot over the past few days. I feel like a new person. Happy, relaxed, but alert and emotionally stable. Quality of life is up 75% to 90% if I had to rate it. (previous psychiatrist asked me to rate things in percentages like that)
I hope this keeps up. I have more faith again in modern medicine and will stay away from the "herb" (grass). I haven't used it in 15 years.
:-)
alprazolam (Xanax) 1mg TID
black tea: 3-4 cups/day
GNC Ultra Mega Gold vitamin supplement, BIDDx: panic disorder, MDD (unipolar, melancholia), perfectionist, probable PTSD
poster:sukarno
thread:952889
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20100628/msgs/952889.html