Posted by Enigma on August 31, 2010, at 10:01:18
In reply to Re: 'Best Psychiatrist' list - I'm Off Nardil now!, posted by ed_uk2010 on August 29, 2010, at 13:43:04
> >I get some hits from people I wouldn't look twice at, in amazement that they would even email me in the first place....
>
> Why, because you're so attractive?
>
> Enigma really, you have to learn to be more accepting of women's faults. After all, you want them to accept you and your faults, don't you?
>Well, I'm not trying to sound arrogant, but yes, it's because I'm much more attractive than they are. I'm in much better shape, than they are. Probably much smarter and have a plethora of other qualities than I excel in over them, as well. Sorry, but I've never met my equal (besides Sarah). I actually feel, to some degree, if the other person agrees of course, is that you can provide eye-candy to each-other, for as long as age allows. I've seen many beautiful women with hideous men, and it just always bothers me. I don't really care how juvenile that sounds. Vice-verse bothers me just as much, hell, even in a gay couple that I know.
I just don't think it's fair that a guy or girl met someone that they were physically compatible with, and shared a mutual physical attraction, then 5-10 years later, one of them lets themselves completely go, while the other maintains (and works at) their physical attractiveness.Met a women that was divorced and cheated on for a such a reason, and met others on-line as well. The husband, in these personal cases, got literally disgusted by what their spouse has turned into. I am NOT saying I agree with this mentality, especially how the men cheated, lied, and ended up severely hurting their spouse instead bringing up this "problem" (if it's a problem for them, than it's a real problem, it doesn't matter how trivial some people on here may think it is.) with their spouse and explaining to them.
I try to find women that are my physical and mental counterpart. I don't have the luxury of meeting someone nice, and falling for them, even though I'm not physically attracted to them. I don't leave the house, haven't worked in years, and have no desire or energy to join some group, activity and so forth to meet people, just to get hurt again, when that activity ends, and people ALWAYS go their separate ways. At least that's been my experience, during my entire life.
Don't judge me for what I am and am not attracted to. It's really the same thing (to a degree) that most men find attractive and unattractive. See a playboy if you're not sure what's considered globally "attractive". It's personal taste. Like I said in another message, I can no more change what I find attractive (and NEED to be happy), than I can willingly change my eye-color. I don't just wish I had a Ferrari, I need one, which would be a somewhat crude but accurate portrayal on my libido. I already said, I wish this wasn't the case, but it's who I am. I've tried to change, but it's never worked.
I also feel, I have deserved something "better" than myself, at least in the looks dept, actually, and beyond. Compared to my wife, she's had the better "deal", minus my illness to deal with of course, since day 1. I'm not going to bother making a list of these traits. This was not a fair relationship, and it failed for good reason. I really tried, and for 10 years fooled myself into thinking it was working. Maybe this is the cause of my depression.. the change from bio-polar to pure depression. I was never satisfied, in so many ways, I can't count.
I just believe in fairness, no matter how unrealistic it may be. I believe couples should be evenly matched on a number of categories. I don't believe in what the masses believe in - That if a girl is a ten, and you're rich, then that's equal. I think those women are just whores. I know people who have married for money, women only, and they sicken me. I could never do it, not even for a minute.
Enough about me.. this is getting ridiculous. It's time for a new thread that doesn't cover this topic.
poster:Enigma
thread:955737
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20100829/msgs/960790.html