Posted by AMD on April 3, 2013, at 17:13:41
In reply to Re: Does this get better? » AMD, posted by SLS on April 3, 2013, at 13:32:52
SLS --
I am in my mid-30s and haven't had a major depressive episode in almost a decade, this in spite of weekend use of alcohol and cocaine for almost the entire time.
I can only imagine this weekend was different for two reasons: (i) for the first time in an already drunk and cocaine-induced state I found myself around the substances and, my self-control already at a minimum, I imbibed without thinking; or (ii) my cocaine and alcohol use has steadily become more damaging to my self-control that it was a crossing of a boundary than the mere presence of the other drugs' availability that led to the use.
In either case, bad news and a wake up call.
It's been about 100 hours now and I still feel really down. I slept at work today for four hours and just want to go home and get back into bed. This is not sustainable so I hope the depressed mood lifts soon.
amd
> > Seventy two hours after a party where I drank heavily, insufflated cocaine, inhaled amyl nitrate, took one huff of some other inhalent, and, horribly, smoked crystal meth --
>
> Don't do that anymore.
>
> What was your motivation for taking these substances?
>
> > this an all-time low -- I'm still feeling ill, depressed, and generally hopeless.
>
> Some of these drugs can produce damage to nerve cells - especially methamphetamine. Don't do that anymore.
>
> > Does this get better?
>
> It is hard to say. The brain is somewhat resilient, and may find ways to repair itself or compensate for tissue damage by rerouting neural circuits. It is difficult for me to imagine that you have damaged the physiology of your brain in a way that would leave you "stuck" in depression. Instead, I would think it more likely that you "triggered" a latent depressive disorder that is treatable. In fact, it might be that you have been experiencing a subsyndromal depression for quite awhile, which led you to "self-medicate" and experiment with various. Many addictions are the result of anomalous brain function that is hard to treat behaviorally. I'm glad that you are scared. I hope you stay scared. Stick with the addiction programs offered to you and take a serious look at the possibility that you triggered a major depressive episode.
>
> How old are you?
>
>
> - Scott
poster:AMD
thread:1041529
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20130322/msgs/1041624.html