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Re: Two separate phenomenon here folks! » Augustina

Posted by Maxime on March 10, 2005, at 1:41:55

In reply to Re: Two separate phenomenon here folks! » Maxime, posted by Augustina on March 8, 2005, at 18:25:26

Yes, I see a psychiatrist. I am very upfront about my ED with him which I know is uncommon. But I don't play games anymore with doctors. However, I don't think he believes me. He has never seen me at a low and emaciated weight. Maybe he thinks I am exagerating. Maybe he doesn't know anything about EDs. Maybe is so focused on my depression and suicidal ideation that he not bringing up my ED.

I think I want to continue down this path so that I self destruct. I think that seems to be my ultimate goal. I would rather die from an ED than suicide. Although they are one in the same, but "outsiders" don't know that.

I am exhausted now but I will try to post more tomorrow.

You take care of yourself too, okay?

Maxime

> Hi Maxime,
>
> I was just wondering, is your doctor a psychiatrist? are you also seeing a therapist currently? I hope I'm not being too nosy but your last post had me concerned about you. I'm dealing with my own inner conflict too...do I truly want to recover or do I want to continue with this downward spiral of restricting, dieting, compulsive exercising, feeling guilty, etc...
>
> Please take good care of yourself and let me know how you're doing.
> -A.

 

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