Posted by scratchpad on February 25, 2007, at 9:55:39
Had a houseguest this weekend, a childhood friend of my DH's. He has always been an enormous trigger to me due to his alcoholic behaviour. He has no understanding of how "personal spaces" work, and is literally in my face unless I hold him out at my arms' length. Very touchy-feely in an uncomfrotable, though not sexual way. Just too darn close! I do restrict how often I see him, but he is my hubby's friend. Quite often, our visits leave me in a trembling rage, determined not to have to spend any time with him. I told my DH that I'd be on my guard this time, as I'm not prepared to sacrifice any more weekends to his wreck of a life.
This weekend I put on my boundary armor and stood my ground. When he uttered thoughtless and provocative words, I stayed quiet and did not respond.
disengageWhen he asked inappropriate questions about the state of my mental health, I smiled and said, "I'm doing fine, thanks."
disengageWhen he started swearing loudly at the table during last night's restaurant meal, I told him his behaviour appalled me. He thought I was joking. I assured him that I wasn't. He has quite the potty mouth when he's loaded.
Now, I'm going to use my sage bundle and perform a cleansing ritual for the house.Scratchpad
poster:scratchpad
thread:735983
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/esteem/20061105/msgs/735983.html