Posted by sassyfrancesca on February 22, 2008, at 13:32:09
Hi, babblers: i am still grieving after 4 years......over the loss of marriage; such as it was (LOL); verbally abuseive (and some physical abuse); I got the courage to get a divorce, and then experienced a kind of abuse I had never heard of; Spiritual (abuse).
My church of 31 years voted me out of membership, with my name up on a big screen, followed by the words: "Conduct Unbecoming a Child of God." I fought the system for 18 months to try and stop the pastor (of disaster, LOL) from "counseling" any more women, because 2 of them wanted to commit suicide (because of his "counseling" skills).
I was the poster-child for the fear of being alone, and so getting a divorce was a monumental choice. It hasn't gotten any better; I still hate being alone.
I went back to school this Fall (age 61!), and recently won a scholarship (I was 1 of 10 recipients out of 1,600 applicants in the U.S. and Canada).
I am the moderator of an abused survivors' group.
Something lovely came from the church debacle: My faith-based website with over 14,500 hits.Elie Wiesel (survivor of Auschwitz) has written to me; I am both humbled and honored.
I've written my memoir: Ghost Child to Triumph (from a child with no voice, to someone who speaks up against injustice).
I realize there is nothing that will help me heal any faster, and I really don't see myself stopping grieving, until I am in a loving relationship. I stay busy, etc.....but it doesn't work.Love to all........SassyFrancesca
poster:sassyfrancesca
thread:814109
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/grief/20070414/msgs/814109.html