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I just want to be normal

Posted by LeilaH on May 17, 2004, at 15:30:30

Hello all...I am looking for some advice. My quality of life is rapidly diminishing, I am about to lose my job, and I am entertaining the thought of taking the "easy" way out without even realizing it, I am disturbed by suicidal thoughts. I am 25 years old, single, no children, and I am having the most horrible time with what I think may be a severe depression, or anxiety. I have experienced depression before, as well as manic episodes, but it was mostly when I was an adolescent. Now, I literally can't find a reason to get out of bed, I have been late for work for consecutive weeks, and I am plagued with nightmares of my childhood, seemingly out of the blue, that has my stomach twisted in knots by the time I do wake up, usually hours past when my alarm was originally supposed to wake me up. I hear glass breaking when I try to fall asleep, I relive scenes of domestic violence when I close my eyes, and I have been fine for years, I don't understand. I was prescribed 20mg of Fluoxetine a day, and I have been taking them for nearly 8 weeks now...it's getting much worse, even with the pills. I am going through Native American health services for free help, and the doctors won't talk to me, they seem to have time to prescribe this pill and that's it, out the door. I am very afraid that I am going to lose it soon; I need help. Please, if anyone knows of somewhere that I can turn to, I live in Oklahoma City, and I really do want to get better.

Thank you,
~Leila


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poster:LeilaH thread:347878
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/newbs/20040420/msgs/347878.html