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Re: But if I do bad things, aren't I bad? » Dinah

Posted by shar on June 10, 2003, at 12:37:11

In reply to Re: But if I do bad things, aren't I bad? » shar, posted by Dinah on June 8, 2003, at 15:51:54

> Hi Shar. My more emotional self focuses a lot on good and bad, and does tend to believe that I'm a good girl if I do good, or a bad girl if I do bad (or make someone angry, or any number of things).

...........Well, I'm happy to hear you do get credit for being a good girl when you're good. I suspect, however, that being good has a much more limited definition or set of behaviors than the being bad one does.

>
> I am overcome with my natural consequences and rather obsessed with the idea that it is because I was bad. Because if I had been good, these things wouldn't be happening.

.........Please forgive my focus on machine-like logic, but, during the whole time you were ignoring your diet and developing financial troubles...you WERE good, at times. That's the deal, I think, it's not all bad or good; it's a mix of both.

>
> Sigh. I know it's an immature way of looking at things, but I can be quite immature.

.........lol, I'll join your club if you'll let me! I am (at my house) at least the Princess of Immaturity, if not the Queen! Immaturity (whatever that is) is ingrained in us, probably a gene or something; I don't believe I know one "adult" who is 100% mature (whatever that is), and who'd want to be anyway? I can see the appeal if a form of thinking is not helpful (and called immature) that one might want to change it. However, I'd encourage you to see it as 'not helpful' rather than immature, because the latter has societally negative overtones that if we buy into will be even less helpful to us. Maybe even double plus ungood!

.........I know I must grate on you, but til you tell me 'don't talk to me anymore' I'll probably keep on.

Shar


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