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Re: what's transference? » Penny

Posted by Larry Hoover on July 5, 2003, at 12:13:33

In reply to Re: what's transference? » Slinky, posted by Penny on July 2, 2003, at 21:49:11

> Depends on who you ask. From my perspective, transference is when you transfer feelings you have for an important person/event in your life onto your therapist or psychiatrist. For example, you may have a great deal of anger from childhood toward your father, and you may find yourself feeling angry toward your male therapist, but supposedly it's really about your dad, not your therapist. Okay, probably not explained as clearly as I'm sure some others will.
>
> My issue with the term "transference" is that I feel like it downplays the importance and reality of the feelings we have toward our caregivers/therapists/doctors/etc. In my case, my therapist is my ideal 'mother' and my psychiatrist is my ideal 'father', and I see that connection in that I am learning to nurture myself through them, the way I would have ideally learned through my actual parents, but I don't think that makes my feelings toward my therapist and psychiatrist any less real.
>
> Not that transference infers that the feelings aren't real - it's just my interpretation. I don't particularly like that terminology.
>
> But transference can be a powerful thing. If one allows it to truly occur, that is.

I think you did a good job explaining what transference is, and how it can actually be useful in a therapeutic relationship. However, I personally would not limit transference to just care-givers. I think transference is an issue in all interpersonal relationships. It's part of the baggage we carry around.

For example, it's been said that we tend to marry people similar to our parents. Although some would add that has something to do with comfort and familiarity, I see at as very fertile ground for transference.

Lar

 

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