Posted by 64bowtie on March 3, 2004, at 20:16:06
1. I was born with enough tools to maintain order in my life, including new information in balance and harmony.
2. My internal conflicts contain little supporting logic. Feelings do not provide workable solutions to my problems. If I live my life as feelings, my adult life will remain messy and full of unresolved conflicts, both internal and with others.
3. My degree of dysfunction is proportional to my collection of bad habits and unresolved conflicts. My chronic indecision locks me into a continuation of multi-level and multi-generational family dysfunction. My denial throws away to key to the lock.
4. As a child, fear of the unknown was induced and the remedy was to freeze. As an adult learning by deduction, danger is no longer an abstract concept and adults can reason that respect for danger replaces fear with much better results. As a child, avoidance of the new (stuff) was induced by my parents. As an adult, replacing avoidance with curiosity and discovery, provides optional outcomes to choose from.
5. I was being manipulated through induction learning as a child. Beliefs, opinions and taboos, were induced offering no optional outcomes. As an adult, I can improve my performance by identifying which beliefs and opinions are mine and which are remnants from my childhood.
Note: Opinions are only a story about what happened held confident but with no direct or immediate knowledge of the occurance. Beliefs are a tool reflecting facts and opinions supported only by testimony. Taboos are multi-generational beliefs always containing dire consequences. The origin of a taboo resides in a distant murky past. Around age 12 or 13, problem solving techniques started to expand by my addition of logic into the problem solving process. I no longer had to wait for (safe) information to be induced. I could now compare my perceptions to my knowledge and deduce my own strategies for problem solving.6. I must accept that "Who I am" is not measured by "What I do (did)". "Who I am" is a fact, whereas "What I do (did)" is mostly opinion or testimony. I find this key to an effective notion of self-respect. Without self-respect, there is no chance for self-esteem, or realizing respect for others.
7. Violence and coercion as conflict resolution techniques, are leftovers of inappropriate parenting in my childhood producing miserable results anytime they are employed.
Rod
poster:64bowtie
thread:319907
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040303/msgs/319907.html