Posted by 64bowtie on May 20, 2004, at 14:23:29
...we are able to reason in new ways. We can think [A N D] feel solutions to problems.
We can't let our feelings run-away-with our sensabilities. Sure, we've all been feeling longer than we've been thinking. Suddenly, we are 13 and can think. We must find a way to balance our thinking and feeling. One way is to catch our-selves feeling stuff, but calling it thinking. Yes, it is all our reasoning. Adding thinking to the reasoning abilities, only improves the results, because we did it, it wasn't done for us. Then we can find balance and harmony.
Expectations are one way; to us, not from us.
Obligations are one way; from us, not to us.
Obligations and expectations are feelings. No thinking required. Children are best managed with obligations and expectations. Adults perform best after replacing obligations and expectations with plans, goals, and optional thinking. Yes, thinking. It is important. Functionally important, not a moral obligation.
Thinking can be our first new good habit after we reach puberty. Then, and only then, can we be actors, not reactors, in overcoming our demons of dysfunction; our personal collection of bad habits. Sure, its easy to blame everyone else for our current condition.
Its easier to simply stop doing those things that we do to sabotage ourselves and our sensability. Only then do we find the time for the functional good habits that replace the dysfunctions in our lives. Only then can we find the time to be free and feel the happiness we so desire.
Just stop doing dysfunctional things, with the suddenness of puberty.
Rod
poster:64bowtie
thread:348902
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040512/msgs/348902.html