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Re: Flashbacks are not a choice » Shadowplayers721

Posted by Larry Hoover on October 27, 2004, at 22:55:12

In reply to Flashbacks are not a choice, posted by Shadowplayers721 on October 27, 2004, at 22:31:45

> It is scientifically proven that people with PTSD do have flashbacks. These memories are stored differently and do return. They do not return at a consciously chosen time. These are suppressed memories. They are very debilitating and very painful to re-experience.

I'm very glad, and very proud, that you are speaking out. As a victim of childhood violence and PTSD arising therefrom, I know of the attempts to trivialize my experience, and to silence my voice. I don't need to know that every memory is perfectly accurate. I know what happened, and a sufficient number of those memories are burned into the psyche, irremovable, like tatoos. There are others, arising from conversations with my sister, for example.....I can only call those recovered memories, but I don't doubt them either. I trust my sister, as she watched me take it. She remembers my pain, and that's good enough external validation for me.

For my own purposes, I have never blamed my mom. I see that as serving no purpose but to damage another sad life even more. Believe me, her own thoughts are quite sufficient punishment, all by themselves. By not wanting to blame her, I am no longer bound in the role of victim. I am empowered to shape that old way into something more resembling of normalcy. I have no illusions to fix it, but by avoiding blame, I can focus on improving a bad place, a bad way of being. I make a lot of lemonade.

Rambling....tired....sleep meds kicking in....i hope i made some sense.

Lar

 

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poster:Larry Hoover thread:406646
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041026/msgs/408200.html