Posted by Dinah on February 11, 2005, at 19:52:06
In reply to Re: A parent who drank a lot, posted by Tabitha on February 11, 2005, at 13:39:52
I think I'd be right with you if my father had been drunk, as opposed to drinking. My exposure to my father's friends left me with a permanent distaste for inebriation. In fact, not only have I never been drunk, but I put my poor husband off the usual college hijinks with my nose wrinkled description of "pale, flaccid, and sweaty". Poor guy never could have a good time getting blasted with that description hovering over him.
So my unspoken belief was probably that it was ok to drink a lot as long as you never got drunk. In fact, I don't ever recall any of us trying to get him to stop drinking. We all campaigned to get him to stop smoking, but not to stop drinking. And Daddy hated getting drunk. The few times he did, at parties, he'd come home and rock in the rocking chair all night.
I have to admit that I think it was wrong of him to have quite so many drunk friends around, so many that it seemed like all men drank to excess. And they'd needle me too, because I showed what I thought about them. And he'd let them. And to make matters worse, he had a relative who got drunk daily live with us for some time. I mostly forget that, although when I remember it I recall how very unpleasant it was for so many reasons, and how angry I was with him for that.
My father was wrong for doing those things. I might excuse the constant elevated blood alchohol level, but I don't excuse bad behavior.
(I'm not trying to be offensive here, by the way. I take full responsibility for my feelings about inebriation. They're my feelings, a result of my own history. They have nothing to do with alchoholics really.)
poster:Dinah
thread:456043
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050211/msgs/456501.html